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Tales from the Loo: Chile's Attack!!

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#341 texas blues

texas blues

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Posted 07 April 2019 - 02:31 PM

No big stories here but I have learned that peppers will clear me out. I don't regret it - what's the alternative, going around with a gut full of stale crap?


Sorry if this is Too Much Information but sometimes when I take a pepper crap I'm mainly unloading older stuff and then the last bit comes out with the sparklers lit.




There is no.


"Too much information".


In this thread.


Chile's are the original.


Colon cleanser.


Happy colon.


Happy life.

#342 Hab_Nut


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Posted 07 April 2019 - 03:05 PM

For board members outside of the United States market: One of the leading brands of toilet tissue here is Charmin. For a while now they have run commercial television messages with cartoon bears enjoying their product.


Here in the US there is the the rhetorical saying, "Does a bear sh1t in the woods?" meaning, What do you think, it's obvious.


Some very brave sales executive pitched that idea in some business meeting, and received approval.




#343 texas blues

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Posted 07 April 2019 - 07:29 PM



But I've set Charmin on fire.


With no matches.


Just wiping my butt.







#344 tardy



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Posted 25 July 2019 - 11:04 PM

OK, this is kind of a long one, but I swear that it is true :halo: :


So it must have been what, 2007? 2008? The ghost pepper (Bhut jolokia) was still pretty new at that point (well, the people in northern India had known about them for many many years, but the outside world had just "discovered" them a few years back), the new "hottest pepper in the world" - up until that point, the habanero was king. Anyway, I found that a company (I think it was CaJohn's) was selling some prototype batches of their first ghost pepper sauce on ebay. They had several different batches/formulations available, and I chose to try one that was simply 80% crushed ghost pepper and 20% vinegar.
It arrived on a Thursday. At that time, the manufacturing facility that I worked for had cut our hours back to four 8-hour days a week, Monday to Thursday, so I settled in for a long weekend of getting acquainted with the ghost pepper.
First up, for that Thursday night meal, I had a 1/2 pound (or a 1/4 kilo, if you prefer) bison cheeseburger. I put a couple of drops of the ghost pepper sauce on the edge and took a bite. Now, I had read that the ghost is a creeper, meaning it doesn't show its full strength at first, but ramps the heat up after the initial taste. That it did, and I was in no doubt that this was, indeed, far hotter than a habanero! Tastier, too (for me anyway). I proceeded to eat that bison burger, adding 2 to 3 drops of the sauce on each bite. 
I awoke the next morning and, as is usual for me, first thing was to hit the bathroom and clear out the previous day's food intake. I've always been quite punctual in that regard. Anyway, I had a slight burn happening - a touch of the old "ring of fire," if you will - but hey, I was expecting that. What I wasn't expecting was the creeper effect. The burning built over the course of a minute or two. It got pretty bad. Another reminder that these were much hotter than habaneros. It eventually abated, but honestly, it was pretty damn unpleasant.
I proceeded to have my new ghost pepper hot sauce with Fridays' breakfast. Then with lunch. And then dinner.
Saturday morning, I woke up and, uncharacteristically, I did not feel any need to, um, have a movement. Again, I've always been very consistent with starting my day this way, but there are occasional fluctuations in the routine. I was kind of happy I didn't have to go, since I knew what kind of burn was coming.
I continued to use the hot sauce for my Saturday meals. 
Sunday morning, I awoke and, shockingly, still had no need to use the facilities. Now, 2 days of not going was unheard of for me. Never happened. It wasn't like I had to go and couldn't, I just simply didn't have any need to go. Nothing in the chamber.
I spent Sunday eating more of the hot sauce. Breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Monday morning, I wake up and I HAVE TO GO. NOW. So I hit the bathroom and punish the porcelain. And you know what? Not a bit of burn. Not even a tingle. Nothing.
Now here it is, over 10 years later, and I have never had a burn down there in all that time. And I have moved on to the hotter peppers that have become available through the years - Scorpions, 7-Pots, Reapers etc. I eat 'em fresh, and they're insanely hot in the mouth, but I've never had as much as a hint of an exit tingle from them.
I figure, over that weekend, after the first serious "ring of fire," that somehow my body "rewired" itself in protection. I know, that's pretty far-fetched, but how do you explain it?
PS - I will note that, with the really insane top-tier heat level peppers, a new phenomenon has arisen: if I eat enough of them in a single day, like maybe 6 or 7, my urine sometimes burns in a quite spectacular and painful way. So far, no "rewiring" has occured to help that. There's also another somewhat related topic re: capsaicin build-up and concentration in the body when I over-consume the superhots, but I'll not go into that one; I will say that I had to profusely apologize to the girlfriend with that discovery.
PPS - after getting that first bottle of ghost pepper sauce, I remeber telling my good friend John that I had hit my limit for heat, and if they ever discovered a hotter pepper than the Bhut jolokia, I would probably not even try it. Ha, famous last words, as they say. These days I don't even consider a ghost pepper to be all that hot! Tolerance is a funny thing.

Edited by tardy, 25 July 2019 - 11:06 PM.

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