• Start a personal food blog, or, start a community food thread for all.

Burgers? Hell Yeah!!

Hey y'all looking through the sacred THP scrolls it is apparent that most awesome of foods is sorely neglected. That's right chidren's, I'm talkin' about BURGERS!! Sliders. Pub burgers. Fast food style burgers. Gastro burgers. Cheffy burgers. CHEESEBURGERS!!! Single and double meat. Triple meat. Extreme burgers. Man vs. Food burgers....the list is endless but y'all get the idea.

We won't go into the endless arguments of who created the first hamburger (Fletcher Davis) or what meat qualifies as a burger. Nonetheless....here are the rules for posting in this soon to be awesome thread:

1. Any meat goes. Beef, chicken, pork, lamb, rat, fish. Whatever, hunt it down and kill it with a knife. Its all good and I've included the options other than the traditional beef so all the kids can play in the pool. If its ground and round, its all good.

2. The damn 'thang has to be between 2 slices of bread or bun. White bread. Brioche. Sourdough. English muffin. Whole wheat. Its got to be bready. No wrap crap or wild pizza dough like chingaderra's.

3. Any cooking method goes. Grilled. Broiled. Griddled. Steamed. Deep fried. Zippo lighter.

4. Because I love to ridicule to no end tree hugging granola wimps and hippy's.....
Veggie burgers are all good. Just be prepared for the woe and gnashing of teeth and smack talk that will soon come if you post it. It will be all in fun and all good.

5. You suck at cooking? The only thing that would suck more is if you posted pics of your restaurant burger. For the sake of keeping the comedy rolling...
Any burger you didn't cook or you bought is allowed and is all good. Warning: while allowed, posting pics of BK burgers or their ilk with a splash of tabasco will bring upon you the most ridicule and insults. Even more than a veggie burger!

6. Chile's and/or hotsauce is mandatory on the burger. ON the burger, no crap on the side.

7. Pics are mandatory. No posting about a burger you made or ate without pics. You will suffer extreme ridicule and experience much loathing. Just don't do it.

8. Include a list of condiments and toppings. Mayo. Mustard. Onions. Cheese. Extract of male baboon spermatazoa. Whatever. Post it.

There it is y'all. Can you get down brown with it? Allrighty then...

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Here's mine. Sliders. 80/20 ground chuck from Matador Meat Market, Frisco, Tx. Cooked over fine diced yellow onions in cast iron using the smash technique. Toasted Pepperidge Farm slider buns with mustard, the onions, dill pickle and jalapeno pickle slices. Kraft brand American Plastic Cheese.

IMG_3447.jpg


Adult beverages are encouraged in the pics but not mandatory. Dig that awesome cast iron crust sear!

IMG_3448.jpg



So bring on your burgers. And that means those damn Aussie's and their stinkin' beet root too!!
 
The Hot Pepper said:
Life would be pretty boring if a burger was made exactly the same way every time.
 
Sometimes this forum cracks me up. LOL. The same conversations happen all the time. No beans in chili. No this no that. Live a little!
 
When I come home I want to kiss my wife.
 
I want to kiss my dog.
 
I want to want to wake up every day just like I do.
 
I want the same boring 'thang every day.
 
I don't want lettuce on my burger and don't want beans in my chili.
 
Not because lettuce or beans are against the law or some such.
 
I love salad long time and always have pintos and black beans in the pantry.
 
I just don't like to be liking them on my burger or chili.
 
Just like I don't want tomato sauce in my gulyas.
 
Or crawfish in my kolache.
 
Living a little means chasing something that maybe you'll like or not.
 
Living a lot means you already know.
 
I'll take Boring for $500 Alex!
 
I get that part. But nobody was making you eat that burger with lettuce, it's just a pic on the ole interwebs and you can take yours off. :lol:
 
In my opinion if somebody has a video on how to make a good burger and they put a topping you don't like, it's pretty easy just not to use it. Did you watch it or just freak out over the lettuce? :lol:
 
I can understand maybe having been beat with a head of lettuce or having been forced to use a sack of beans for a pillow as child. Perhaps some sort of repressed childhood memory.. Shit happens.. I get it.
 
Enjoy your lettuce burgers.
 
And your bean chile stew.
 
I don't care.
 
Ain't nobody got time for that!
 
Because when you get older.
 
You really ain't got time for that.
 
Back
Top