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Burgers? Hell Yeah!!

Hey y'all looking through the sacred THP scrolls it is apparent that most awesome of foods is sorely neglected. That's right chidren's, I'm talkin' about BURGERS!! Sliders. Pub burgers. Fast food style burgers. Gastro burgers. Cheffy burgers. CHEESEBURGERS!!! Single and double meat. Triple meat. Extreme burgers. Man vs. Food burgers....the list is endless but y'all get the idea.

We won't go into the endless arguments of who created the first hamburger (Fletcher Davis) or what meat qualifies as a burger. Nonetheless....here are the rules for posting in this soon to be awesome thread:

1. Any meat goes. Beef, chicken, pork, lamb, rat, fish. Whatever, hunt it down and kill it with a knife. Its all good and I've included the options other than the traditional beef so all the kids can play in the pool. If its ground and round, its all good.

2. The damn 'thang has to be between 2 slices of bread or bun. White bread. Brioche. Sourdough. English muffin. Whole wheat. Its got to be bready. No wrap crap or wild pizza dough like chingaderra's.

3. Any cooking method goes. Grilled. Broiled. Griddled. Steamed. Deep fried. Zippo lighter.

4. Because I love to ridicule to no end tree hugging granola wimps and hippy's.....
Veggie burgers are all good. Just be prepared for the woe and gnashing of teeth and smack talk that will soon come if you post it. It will be all in fun and all good.

5. You suck at cooking? The only thing that would suck more is if you posted pics of your restaurant burger. For the sake of keeping the comedy rolling...
Any burger you didn't cook or you bought is allowed and is all good. Warning: while allowed, posting pics of BK burgers or their ilk with a splash of tabasco will bring upon you the most ridicule and insults. Even more than a veggie burger!

6. Chile's and/or hotsauce is mandatory on the burger. ON the burger, no crap on the side.

7. Pics are mandatory. No posting about a burger you made or ate without pics. You will suffer extreme ridicule and experience much loathing. Just don't do it.

8. Include a list of condiments and toppings. Mayo. Mustard. Onions. Cheese. Extract of male baboon spermatazoa. Whatever. Post it.

There it is y'all. Can you get down brown with it? Allrighty then...

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Here's mine. Sliders. 80/20 ground chuck from Matador Meat Market, Frisco, Tx. Cooked over fine diced yellow onions in cast iron using the smash technique. Toasted Pepperidge Farm slider buns with mustard, the onions, dill pickle and jalapeno pickle slices. Kraft brand American Plastic Cheese.

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Adult beverages are encouraged in the pics but not mandatory. Dig that awesome cast iron crust sear!

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So bring on your burgers. And that means those damn Aussie's and their stinkin' beet root too!!
 
SmokenFire said:
while the rest of yall are bitchin about lettuce to be or not to be on a burger...  I'm over here like did he for real just start building, then serve them finished burgers on the same cookie sheet he had the raw patties on  :shocked:   classic cross-contamination  WTG  :sick:
1:56 raw patties on the cookie sheet
5:36 building the cooked burgers using the same cookie sheet as a serving platter :sick:
 
Guatemalan Insanity Pepper said:
wouldn't be if i ate one of those sriracha cheeseburger dogs  :sick:
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
:mope:  I really want a burger. We are having chicken again tonight  :neutral:
 
So make a chicken burger.
 
At my local TryNSave they sell a metric shit-ton (Official SoFlo Measurement) of ground chicken.
 
Pre-packaged.
 
Mostly asians, hippy's, and old folks buying it.
 
But SOMEBODY is making a burger with it!
 
 
I rarely eat chicken.
 
But I did make katsu chicken recently for my dear sweet wife and had a taste.
 
Fantastic with rice and mac salad!
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=882a75op1f0
 
I got nothing tonight.
 
Not even a smashed burger on a burnt bun.
 
But the jones is kickin' in.
 
Hard!
 
Kind sirs....
 
Aussie bastiges....
 
Please post a pic of a burger.
 
Do it and I will forward to you an email.
 
From a Nigerian friend.
 
He will pay you 100 million US million dollars for that burger.
 
I shinola you not.
 
Tried my hand at making some smash burgers.  Did not smash them in the pan, rather patted them out very flat before cooking.  I liked the results, but the insanity salt from GIP I mixed into the meat really lit me up!  Garnished with colby jack & american cheese, dijon,mayo, grilled onions, an actually ok grocery store tomato and that stuff TB throws on the floor.  ;)
 
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