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Burgers? Hell Yeah!!

Hey y'all looking through the sacred THP scrolls it is apparent that most awesome of foods is sorely neglected. That's right chidren's, I'm talkin' about BURGERS!! Sliders. Pub burgers. Fast food style burgers. Gastro burgers. Cheffy burgers. CHEESEBURGERS!!! Single and double meat. Triple meat. Extreme burgers. Man vs. Food burgers....the list is endless but y'all get the idea.

We won't go into the endless arguments of who created the first hamburger (Fletcher Davis) or what meat qualifies as a burger. Nonetheless....here are the rules for posting in this soon to be awesome thread:

1. Any meat goes. Beef, chicken, pork, lamb, rat, fish. Whatever, hunt it down and kill it with a knife. Its all good and I've included the options other than the traditional beef so all the kids can play in the pool. If its ground and round, its all good.

2. The damn 'thang has to be between 2 slices of bread or bun. White bread. Brioche. Sourdough. English muffin. Whole wheat. Its got to be bready. No wrap crap or wild pizza dough like chingaderra's.

3. Any cooking method goes. Grilled. Broiled. Griddled. Steamed. Deep fried. Zippo lighter.

4. Because I love to ridicule to no end tree hugging granola wimps and hippy's.....
Veggie burgers are all good. Just be prepared for the woe and gnashing of teeth and smack talk that will soon come if you post it. It will be all in fun and all good.

5. You suck at cooking? The only thing that would suck more is if you posted pics of your restaurant burger. For the sake of keeping the comedy rolling...
Any burger you didn't cook or you bought is allowed and is all good. Warning: while allowed, posting pics of BK burgers or their ilk with a splash of tabasco will bring upon you the most ridicule and insults. Even more than a veggie burger!

6. Chile's and/or hotsauce is mandatory on the burger. ON the burger, no crap on the side.

7. Pics are mandatory. No posting about a burger you made or ate without pics. You will suffer extreme ridicule and experience much loathing. Just don't do it.

8. Include a list of condiments and toppings. Mayo. Mustard. Onions. Cheese. Extract of male baboon spermatazoa. Whatever. Post it.

There it is y'all. Can you get down brown with it? Allrighty then...

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Here's mine. Sliders. 80/20 ground chuck from Matador Meat Market, Frisco, Tx. Cooked over fine diced yellow onions in cast iron using the smash technique. Toasted Pepperidge Farm slider buns with mustard, the onions, dill pickle and jalapeno pickle slices. Kraft brand American Plastic Cheese.

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Adult beverages are encouraged in the pics but not mandatory. Dig that awesome cast iron crust sear!

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So bring on your burgers. And that means those damn Aussie's and their stinkin' beet root too!!
 
Click to expand...
Nice! What temps are your par fry and final fry?
 
You can't control the temp on that thing, it fries hot too. Hotter than I like. I fry them for about 3 minutes then let them cool and another fry till the float a minute or two. I use it just for fries, I use the Cool Daddy to fry everything else. It has a thermostat.
 
Hmmm why do you take them out and fry them again at the same temperature? The point of the dual fry is to par cook them at a low temp so they cook thru, and to crisp them at a high them without them burning... taking them out and putting them back in at them same temp, I don't get...  :confused:
 
There's no thermostat and it cooks hot, it works the same way=partially cooked then fried to crisp up. This thing gets too hot, sometimes I unplug it during a fry so the outside doesn't burn.
 
I also don't load more than two serving of fries in it at a time. It's like any other new "make cooking easier " gadget, you have to learn the tool you're using.
 
Try it, it works for me.
 
Ok so you load it up and it par cooks because the oil is not up to temp, you take them out. You let the oil get crazy hot, and put them back in. Okay I can dig that! Probably better than leaving them in all that time, and they turn to fried croutons. 
 
NO. I plug it in, get to temp, drop fries, cook for about 3 minutes remove them, drop new fries, fry for about 3 minutes, remove and drop the first batch back in till floating and crispy, rinse and repeat for 2nd batch. These aren't as crispy as McD's shoestring fries, they're crispy but soft in the middle like steak fries.
 
It cooks hot that the first 3 minute fry cooks the outside enough that the potato isn't soft and mushy when you take it out. 
 
I used red potatoes too and that makes a difference compared to a starchy potato like russets.
 
 
You rinse and repeat meaning rinse cooked fries under water?
 
What da kine?
 
Ninja sorcery.
 
Burger sex and violence.
 
Meat hooliganism.
 
I was waiting for them to waterboard the burger next.
 
Because.
 
You know.
 
Getting it to talk.
 
Is it safe?
 
But those are all just technical terms.
 
Personally.
 
I would've slapped that burger.
 
Between two tortured grilled cheese sammichs.
 
Slapped I said.
 
Tis a violent world that we live in.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
I like to be liking some INO.
 
Animal Style.
 
Splooge.
 
I reckon I need to make some.
 
And smack a cheeseburger with it.
 
In da' face!
 
On another note.
 
I can neither confirm or deny.
 
That there will be cheeseburgers in heaven.
 
Better for us all.
 
If we rock what we got right now.
 
Because.
 
Just in case.
 
Having said that.
 
If in fact they DO have cheeseburgers in heaven.
 
Dear Sweet Baby Jesus!!!
 
I hope they're like this....
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gC-6RSjPOBE&t=3s
 
I've never been to White Manna myself.
 
But.
 
Just like heaven.
 
I really want to go.
 
 
 
Double Double.
 
Kina sorta Animal Style.
 
The right INO chiles.
 
The sauce.
 
The onions.
 
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Black Bettyficate some butter.
 
And squishy white buns.
 
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I have 3 balls.
 
With salt and onions.
 
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Smashed.
 
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Flip it.
 
This is why I love cast iron.
 
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Now chese it.
 
And schmelt it.
 
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Tomato it.
 
Dill pickle it.
 
Splooge it.
 
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Take a bite of burger.
 
And then a bite of chile.
 
Thats how it works.
 
I'll just shut up now.
 
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