• Start a personal food blog, or, start a community food thread for all.

Burgers? Hell Yeah!!

Hey y'all looking through the sacred THP scrolls it is apparent that most awesome of foods is sorely neglected. That's right chidren's, I'm talkin' about BURGERS!! Sliders. Pub burgers. Fast food style burgers. Gastro burgers. Cheffy burgers. CHEESEBURGERS!!! Single and double meat. Triple meat. Extreme burgers. Man vs. Food burgers....the list is endless but y'all get the idea.

We won't go into the endless arguments of who created the first hamburger (Fletcher Davis) or what meat qualifies as a burger. Nonetheless....here are the rules for posting in this soon to be awesome thread:

1. Any meat goes. Beef, chicken, pork, lamb, rat, fish. Whatever, hunt it down and kill it with a knife. Its all good and I've included the options other than the traditional beef so all the kids can play in the pool. If its ground and round, its all good.

2. The damn 'thang has to be between 2 slices of bread or bun. White bread. Brioche. Sourdough. English muffin. Whole wheat. Its got to be bready. No wrap crap or wild pizza dough like chingaderra's.

3. Any cooking method goes. Grilled. Broiled. Griddled. Steamed. Deep fried. Zippo lighter.

4. Because I love to ridicule to no end tree hugging granola wimps and hippy's.....
Veggie burgers are all good. Just be prepared for the woe and gnashing of teeth and smack talk that will soon come if you post it. It will be all in fun and all good.

5. You suck at cooking? The only thing that would suck more is if you posted pics of your restaurant burger. For the sake of keeping the comedy rolling...
Any burger you didn't cook or you bought is allowed and is all good. Warning: while allowed, posting pics of BK burgers or their ilk with a splash of tabasco will bring upon you the most ridicule and insults. Even more than a veggie burger!

6. Chile's and/or hotsauce is mandatory on the burger. ON the burger, no crap on the side.

7. Pics are mandatory. No posting about a burger you made or ate without pics. You will suffer extreme ridicule and experience much loathing. Just don't do it.

8. Include a list of condiments and toppings. Mayo. Mustard. Onions. Cheese. Extract of male baboon spermatazoa. Whatever. Post it.

There it is y'all. Can you get down brown with it? Allrighty then...

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Here's mine. Sliders. 80/20 ground chuck from Matador Meat Market, Frisco, Tx. Cooked over fine diced yellow onions in cast iron using the smash technique. Toasted Pepperidge Farm slider buns with mustard, the onions, dill pickle and jalapeno pickle slices. Kraft brand American Plastic Cheese.

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Adult beverages are encouraged in the pics but not mandatory. Dig that awesome cast iron crust sear!

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So bring on your burgers. And that means those damn Aussie's and their stinkin' beet root too!!
 
luvmesump3pp3rz said:
Mike that burger is outrageous. cheers bud  :cheers:
Thanks, Dude!

Ashen said:
You need a dedicated food instagram Mike. You put out better stuff than most of the ones with thousands of followers.
Wow, haha! Thanks, man! :cheers:

The Hot Pepper said:
And he's got those neon filters to boot :rofl:
I'll have you know, it's called "Chrome," actually :snooty: ;)
If I had enough storage on my phone, I'd update it to the latest iOS, which has the "portrait" filter on it. One of these days I will :)

Edmick said:
That burger should come with a defibrillator ..
FIFY :rofl:

texas blues said:
THP forum members.
 
And lovers.
 
Of cheeseburgers.
 
Bacon wrapped.
 
And pineappleficated.
 
You're all fired.
 
Mike is the new squad leader!
"SIR, YES SIR!!!"
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texas blues said:
mrs. blues turned me on to Earl's Gas & Grocery (Liquor sto' too!) a month or so ago when we moved into the new house. They are only about 7 minutes away at the corner of FM 720 & Hwy. 380.
Tucked into the store is a little kitchen with a flat iron griddle and a fryer. They only have a couple items but the Earl's Burger is the main thing. This is my 3rd burger from Earl's and it is just as awesome as the first one I tried. For cheapness I also got a side of deep fried pickles and a side of poppers. They ROCK!! I got the whole shebang to go for about 10 bucks!

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Don't let the piccy fool you. That's a 1/2 pound burger with topped with american scheeze, mustard, grilled onions, dill pickles and pickled 'peno's.

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Ejole' Johnny Chingas!!! This is a lot of dadgum food! This'll be lunch AND supper. Good 'thang I have yard work to do to work this hot blue and righteous 'thang off.

A little rammy of BC dressing for dippin' the pickles which are dill slices with a cornmeal/cornflour breading. I tell no lies when I say when you eat them... se mi paro!!!

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The poppers listed on their menu are called Fiesta Poppers. Lots of flecks of chile in the breading which is very crisp. The cheese is some kind of cream cheese/cheddar blend. The bonus is that the poppers are not 'peno but some more rounder RED chile. Fat little buggers. Very tasty. First time I've encountered fast food style poppers that weren't the usual lame no heat 'peno variety. Eating them now I am tasting something very close to sriacha flavor. I am digging Earl's more and more with each visit!

Gotta' go cut the grass and prep the backyard and porch for tomorrow's Blues Cue mayhem.

Heche su pinche' scheeze burgers ahora!!
 
Earl's Gas Grocery & Liquor.
 
Still to this day.
 
One of the best burgers.
 
I ever ate.
 
And those pickles....
 
Got dang!
 
Sadly.
 
Earl's is long gone.
 
Burgers.
 
Clean out the freezer.
 
Texsas Gulf shrimps.
 
Only slightly freezerburned.
 
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Now make some gravy.
 
Ranch.
 
Pickled jalapeno.
 
Garlic.
 
Pineapple.
 
Other unknown stuff.
 
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Boat motor it.
 
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Back to the shrimps.
 
Peelem'.
 
Toss some eggs.
 
Some oatmeal.
 
Some breadcrumbs.
 
Badmotorfinger it.
 
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Heavy pet it.
 
And lay it down.
 
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Black Betty it.
 
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Cheese it and please it.
 
On a grilled bun.
 
With tomato and lettuce.
 
Yeah I know.
 
Lettuce.
 
Splooge it.
 
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Paper plate it.
 
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Butt rockett.
 
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Because.
 
Shrimp burger.
 
Still a burger.
 
You want it.
 
Even though you know.
 
It was the kine grinds.
 
It was still rather culinary gay.
 
Like a tranny burger.
 
With nice makeup.
 
And a fresh shave.
 
I ate it anyway.
 
It was still.
 
Goodern' Liberace'.
 
On gladiator night.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Good gawd man, I'd like to be invited to a party where those shrimp burgers were stacked 300 high, and I'd play Jenga with about 200 of them. Capeesh?
 
The Hot Pepper said:
Good gawd man, I'd like to be invited to a party where those shrimp burgers were stacked 300 high, and I'd play Jenga with about 200 of them. Capeesh?
 
I unner stan.
 
But you need to pay some.
 
Baksheesh.
 
To this thread.
 
Whereda' flat top 2 burner.
 
Plancha burger at?
 
You got the golden egg.
 
The kitchen.
 
And now you got the goose.
 
Your legions.
 
Await.
 
Sounds like you want to post a Texas burger. Alright well I should post a Brooklyn burger in the next two weeks. Salmon, cream cheese, dill, egg bun sorta thang with heat somewhere, hmmm, okay I'll kick up that bourbon teriyaki... ok ok......
 
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