Why I Hate IPAs

Being a craft beer lover I'm pretty sure I'm in the minority when I say "I hate IPAs" but after trying at least 5 different IPAs in the last year or so I have yet to say, "Mmm, I actually liked that one." I recetly stumbled on an article written by a beer lover with my sentiments and here are excerpts from his article that I relate to:
 
"Why can’t I just enjoy it? Why does every single IPA make my gut bubble like a Jacuzzi full of soup? Every cicerone is my mortal enemy, every bar with rotating taps, my hop-hell. Oh, you disagree? Pound sand/shred me in the comments, because the reasons for my IPA hatred are completely unassailable.
 
They taste like bougie garbage water
It all starts with that musty, grassy odor. People claim to love it, but that IPA stench hits my nose like a Christmas tree that drenched itself in expired Pine-Sol, then went out clubbing. You know that scene in Se7en, where Brad Pitt & Morgan Freeman find a rotting dude's corpse covered in taxi-cab air fresheners? Spoiler alert: they do. Spoiled beer alert: IPAs smell like that, and yet somehow, they taste even worse.
 
Once it hits your lips, it’s so filling
In addition to tasting like Dumpster jambalaya, IPAs fill me up way too quickly. I can drink 10 normal beers and inhale some disco fries, then get out of bed and brunch like an American hero. But merely one IPA will turn me into a bloated acid-reflux machine who can’t take a step without burping up “nutty finishes” & “hints of cardamom”. Sometimes, this gut-busting feeling gets so bad, I wonder if I should drink less, or even begin to exercise, both of which are patently insane. Stop messing with my head, IPA.
 
They make me feel like I’m taking crazy pills
Whenever I admit my prejudice against IPAs’ viscous villainy, I’m shouted down by legions of diehard fans. They tell me I’m out of my mind, that I haven’t tried the right ones yet, that I just don’t appreciate good beer. The chillest hopheads get in my face, insisting that I must just be a novice who doesn’t “understand” the “subtleties” of something that tastes like microwaved clementine peels. Maybe I do like them, I wonder, pondering my reality. Maybe I don’t even know myself anymore? I should give IPAs another try. This time, when the cedar-y backwash slithers its way down my gullet, I might actually enjo-- OH MY SWEET LORD! THE HUMANITY! OH IT BURNS!
 
I’m jealous of all the fun they’re having
I didn’t even realize how proletarian “normal” beer names were until I got to college. There, I figured out what “proletarian” meant, and also discovered how much fun IPA lingo truly is. I would love to impress my friends by drinking rad-sounding brews like the Epic Hop Zombie, and displaying the rad-looking bottles in my apartment like trophies. But I can’t stand what’s inside, so I’m left out from all the fun of fetishizing. If the beer aisle is Mean Girls, IPAs are the cool ones, and I’m the sexually aggressive mathlete who never gets to bed Lindsay Lohan."
 
I totally agree.  I for one,  cannot stand an IPA.  I've also tried several different IPA's and can't find one that I actually like.  
 
I like all beer.  Except camo.  Seriously the very worst and I'll never drink it again.  Otherwise we're good.  
 
I rarely find an IPA I cant actually appreciate,some are better no doubt
Not all IPA brews shine until  their temp rises above 40*F("Ice cold" is the brainwashed domestic mind set for all things beer)
Learn to drink beer and all that US domestic swill will never cross your lips again.
 
Keep trying,there are 100's on the US market
 
Not a fan of IPA's myself and I brew the beer I drink and grow my own hops.  I prefer a good Ale or Wheat beer for consumption.  Don't get me wrong I'll never pass up a free IPA just dont care for it.  
 
here is a good read that relates to a known condition called Brewers Droop that I came across a while back, check it out:
 
http://www.independencebrewing.com/hops-what-you-didnt-know-about-brewers-droop/
 
and a little history lesson on Hops:
 
http://www.lifetwink.com/beer-hops-estrogen-sedation-of-the-population-men-shouldnt-ever-drink-beer/
 
You gotta work your way up to drink with the big boys. You cant go from keystone right into IPA. In my small circle of friends, I'm the only one that appreciates a full flavored beer, which makes me the coolest. There are many transitional beers out there and I would say Samuel Adams is an important one. I ask people wondering about IPA if they like Samuel Adams, If not, no need in progressing forward to IPA but if so, follow me friend to the wonderful world of real beer.
 
Lager!  There I said it.  Can't anyone just make a decent lager.  Sick of IPA - the overly floral hops, not enough body to balance the bitterness and wispy.  And it seems like that is the only "craft" beer!  Ale ale ale.  Gimme a bloody lager man!
 
RobStar said:
Lager!  There I said it.  Can't anyone just make a decent lager.  Sick of IPA - the overly floral hops, not enough body to balance the bitterness and wispy.  And it seems like that is the only "craft" beer!  Ale ale ale.  Gimme a bloody lager man!
That's not true, the craft ale house I frequent has 20 taps, and only one or two are IPA. They change weekly and have all kinds of lagers, kolschs, sours, session beers, pilsners, steam beers, porters, stouts, whatever. It's different every week but I've never seen more than two IPAs, sometimes only one.
 
Clearly quite a few amateurs IN DA HOUSE!!!
There is no such thing as the perfect beer,regardless of brew style
You have to learn what is actually what and then "WORK" thru every brew style with in your means
Continually trying and yet returning to the US domestic cat piss will make your trek that much harder.
Your either going to drink better beer or your going to drink "COLD" US domestic cat piss and be content with it
This isnt an Obama hand out,you actually have to "work" for this,spend money for this and work some more to continue your quest
Getting alot of the US domestic bullshit out of the way is a GREAT WAY TO KICK IT OFF !!
 
https://www.yahoo.com/food/the-5-biggest-mistakes-youre-making-with-your-beer-100170446606.html

One more for you
http://craftbeertemple.com/videoblog/serving-beer/
 
Umm...
What the hell did you just say?

image.jpg
 
The Hot Pepper said:
That's not true, the craft ale house I frequent has 20 taps, and only one or two are IPA. They change weekly and have all kinds of lagers, kolschs, sours, session beers, pilsners, steam beers, porters, stouts, whatever. It's different every week but I've never seen more than two IPAs, sometimes only one.
 
You lucky.  I'm not in the States.  Very different scenario.  Over here in South Africa there has been a huge upswing in brewing.  But everybody is making IPA and various wishy-washy ales.  I personally prefer stout and lager with few robust ales thrown in - Newcastle Brown ale-style as well as Scottish-style.  I just find IPA to be high-notes with very little body to compensate for the bitterness and overly floral hops.  Balance.  Very important.
 
My favourite brewhouse produces a decent lager - "Old Wobbly" - at 11% it is sure to make you wobble after a few. 
 
TNKS said:
Clearly quite a few amateurs IN DA HOUSE!!!
There is no such thing as the perfect beer,regardless of brew style
You have to learn what is actually what and then "WORK" thru every brew style with in your means
Continually trying and yet returning to the US domestic cat piss will make your trek that much harder.
Your either going to drink better beer or your going to drink "COLD" US domestic cat piss and be content with it
This isnt an Obama hand out,you actually have to "work" for this,spend money for this and work some more to continue your quest
Getting alot of the US domestic bullshit out of the way is a GREAT WAY TO KICK IT OFF !!
 
https://www.yahoo.com/food/the-5-biggest-mistakes-youre-making-with-your-beer-100170446606.html

One more for you
http://craftbeertemple.com/videoblog/serving-beer/
img_troll_6436_orig.gif
 
I like IPAs - they are a bit skunky for a "refreshing" beer, but I know that going in so that's not why/when I order them. 
 
They are also not my 1st choice of beer - I much prefer the darker brews, like stouts and porters. I'd also rather drink a Bock or a lager than an IPA. 
 
But there are certainly exceptions by brand, and when pairing with certain foods.  I'm not going to reach for an IPA on a hot day to provide refreshment, but if I'm eating certain foods I'll absolutely order one. 
 
I know they're not for everyone, and honestly I do think there's an over-saturation going on (most bars seem to have 5 IPAs for every Stout or Porter) but in general it's a very good style of beer. 
 
Meh.... I don't want to have to "WORK" through a beer. That's like holding your nose and "working" through a liver cheese sandwich. I want it to be pleasant and make me WANT to drink it. I don't care if it's IPA, cold "domestic cat piss" as some call it, lager, stout, ale, yadda yadda yadda. I like Coors light, Mic Ultra, Hoegaarden, Stella, Dos Equis, almost everything in the Shiner family.... whatever. If I like it, I like it. If I open a bottle and it smells like a skunk farted in my face, I probably won't like it. If a spoon will stand up in it, I probably won't like it.
 
I'm not a beer snob. I will drink most anything. I do have some brand loyalty, though
 
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