THIS IS AN ACTUAL CUSTOMER REVIEW
FROM A MAN ON AMAZON.CO.UK AFTER
USING VEET HAIR REMOVAL CREAM FOR
MEN. I ACTUALLY HAD TEARS ROLLING
DOWN MY FACE WHILE READING IT!!!!!!!!!!!!
SOOOO FUNNY!!!:
After having been told my danglies looked
like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to
take the plunge and buy some of this as
previous shaving attempts had only been
mildly successful and I nearly put my back
out trying to reach the more difficult bits.
Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would
do the deed on the missus's birthday as
a bit if a treat.
I ordered it well in advance and working in
the North Sea I considered myself a bit
above some of the characters writing the
previous reviews and wrote them off as
soft office types...Oh my fellow sufferers
how wrong I was. I waited until the other
half was tucked up in bed and after giving
some vague hints about a special surprise
I went down to the bathroom. Initially all
went well and I applied the gel and stood
waiting for something to happen. I didnt
have long to wait.
At first there was a gentle warmth which in
a matter of seconds was replaced by an
intense burning and a feeling I can only
describe as like being given a barbed wire
wedgie by two people intent on hitting the
ceiling with my head. Religion hadn't
featured much in my life until that night but
I suddenly became willing to convert to any
religion to stop the violent burning around
the turd tunnel and what seemed like the
the destruction of the meat and two veg.
Struggling not to bite through my bottom
lip I tried to wash the gel off in the sink
and only succeeded in blocking the
plughole with a mat of hair. Through the
haze of tears I struggled out of the
bathroom across the hall into the kitchen,
by this time walking was not really possible
and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in
the hope of some form of cold relief. I
yanked the freezer drawer out and found
a tub of ice cream, toe the lid off and
positioned it under me. The relief was
fantastic but only temporary as it melted
fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing
returned. Due to the shape of the ice
cream tub I hadnt managed to give the
starfish any treatment and I groped around
in the draw for something else as I was
sure my vision was going to fail fairly
soon. I grabbed a bag of what I later
found out was frozen sprouts and tore it
open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took
a handful of them and an tried in vain to
clench some between the cheeks of my
arse. This was not doing the trick as some
of the gel had found its way up the
chutney channel and it felt like the space
shuttle was running its engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only
time in my life I was going to wish there
was a gay snowman in the kitchen which
should give you some idea of the depths I
was willing to sink to in order to ease the
pain. The only solution my pain crazed mind
could come up with was to gently ease
one of the sprouts where no veg had
gone before.
Unfortunately, alerted by the strange
grunts coming from the kitchen the other
half chose that moment to come and
investigate and was greeted by the sight
of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream
dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout
up my arse while muttering ooooohhh that
feels good Understandably this was a
shock to her and she let out a scream and
as I hadnt heard her come in it caused an
involuntary spasm of shock in myself which
resulted in the sprout being ejected at
quite some speed in her direction. I can
understand that having a sprout fired
against your leg at 11 at night in the
kitchen probably wasnt the special
surprise she was expecting and having to
explain to the kids the next day what the
strange hollow in the ice cream was didnt
improve my statusso to sum it up, VEET
removes hair, dignity and self-respect ~
Cerys
FROM A MAN ON AMAZON.CO.UK AFTER
USING VEET HAIR REMOVAL CREAM FOR
MEN. I ACTUALLY HAD TEARS ROLLING
DOWN MY FACE WHILE READING IT!!!!!!!!!!!!
SOOOO FUNNY!!!:
After having been told my danglies looked
like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to
take the plunge and buy some of this as
previous shaving attempts had only been
mildly successful and I nearly put my back
out trying to reach the more difficult bits.
Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would
do the deed on the missus's birthday as
a bit if a treat.
I ordered it well in advance and working in
the North Sea I considered myself a bit
above some of the characters writing the
previous reviews and wrote them off as
soft office types...Oh my fellow sufferers
how wrong I was. I waited until the other
half was tucked up in bed and after giving
some vague hints about a special surprise
I went down to the bathroom. Initially all
went well and I applied the gel and stood
waiting for something to happen. I didnt
have long to wait.
At first there was a gentle warmth which in
a matter of seconds was replaced by an
intense burning and a feeling I can only
describe as like being given a barbed wire
wedgie by two people intent on hitting the
ceiling with my head. Religion hadn't
featured much in my life until that night but
I suddenly became willing to convert to any
religion to stop the violent burning around
the turd tunnel and what seemed like the
the destruction of the meat and two veg.
Struggling not to bite through my bottom
lip I tried to wash the gel off in the sink
and only succeeded in blocking the
plughole with a mat of hair. Through the
haze of tears I struggled out of the
bathroom across the hall into the kitchen,
by this time walking was not really possible
and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in
the hope of some form of cold relief. I
yanked the freezer drawer out and found
a tub of ice cream, toe the lid off and
positioned it under me. The relief was
fantastic but only temporary as it melted
fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing
returned. Due to the shape of the ice
cream tub I hadnt managed to give the
starfish any treatment and I groped around
in the draw for something else as I was
sure my vision was going to fail fairly
soon. I grabbed a bag of what I later
found out was frozen sprouts and tore it
open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took
a handful of them and an tried in vain to
clench some between the cheeks of my
arse. This was not doing the trick as some
of the gel had found its way up the
chutney channel and it felt like the space
shuttle was running its engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only
time in my life I was going to wish there
was a gay snowman in the kitchen which
should give you some idea of the depths I
was willing to sink to in order to ease the
pain. The only solution my pain crazed mind
could come up with was to gently ease
one of the sprouts where no veg had
gone before.
Unfortunately, alerted by the strange
grunts coming from the kitchen the other
half chose that moment to come and
investigate and was greeted by the sight
of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream
dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout
up my arse while muttering ooooohhh that
feels good Understandably this was a
shock to her and she let out a scream and
as I hadnt heard her come in it caused an
involuntary spasm of shock in myself which
resulted in the sprout being ejected at
quite some speed in her direction. I can
understand that having a sprout fired
against your leg at 11 at night in the
kitchen probably wasnt the special
surprise she was expecting and having to
explain to the kids the next day what the
strange hollow in the ice cream was didnt
improve my statusso to sum it up, VEET
removes hair, dignity and self-respect ~
Cerys
