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Hot Sauce HORROR stories

1. Never put a hot pepper in the microwave for a long time, fills your house with a nice gas that burns your lungs. Don't ask why I did that. House had to be evacuated for a little bit.

2. Never carry extracts in your pocket, especially if they leak a little. I had a small bottle of "The Joker" 6 mil SCU in my pocket that had a small leak. By the time I realized it my leg was on fire and stained my pocket with the crazy hot extract. Even after washing my pants I could still feel a tingle when I had them on.
 
I too have put a hot pepper in the microwave whilst drinking with some boguns one night. Had to scull drag max out, he was planning on dying on me from not breathing!
 
Hot Jagerbombs :eek:

Hot Jager shots, to be precise. I don't care for the energy
drink in my alcohol. Whenever I've tried it, I tend to wake
up at 2 AM when the Jager has worn off but the energy
buzz is still present.

Was it on this site or elsewhere that I read about a Thai
restaurant drying a bunch of peppers and causing the en-
tire building to be evacuated?
 
Yes, you read that correctly. Urethra burn!
I have experienced urethra burn twice this week, and it feels like you are pissing razor blades coated in napalm with a burning coals chaser. It's also hard to explain this sensation to people without them first assuming that you have infected with some form of std.
 
The next morning, I woke up and was wondering why I was drooling so much. Wierd. So I got up and looked it the mirror and my face was completely covered in blood. I had no clue at this point what had happened. As I spit the blood out, my mouth would fill up just as fast. It took about 15 minutes of spitting it out to get it finally stop. I then checked my pillow (the memory foam type) and saw that it was now a sponge full of blood.

Wow. Now that is a true HORROR story.

My favorite horror story actually happened to a friend of mine at my instigation (years ago in college). This was before anyone involved was experienced with extremely hot sauces/peppers...

We were at a party and a few of us happened upon a bottle of Blaire's Ultra Death, and were initiated with a small drop on our fingers and each of us (after running for milk) agreed it was way hotter than we even knew was possible. A couple hours later, another friend of mine, call him Slayer, showed up to the party late, and very drunk. Somehow the topic of the Ultra Death sauce came up again, and Slayer immediately decided he was more manly than the rest of us and that a drop of anything could never be that hot to him (note he is/was not a chile head, just drunk and cocky). In my drunken state, and with the benefit of having tried the sauce already, I thought it a good idea to push Slayer with an offer of $100 if he could finish the entire bottle. Slayer turned and looked at me puzzled, as if to say, "You idiot, of course I can and will drink a tiny little bottle of sauce for $100". I shook his hand and without hesitation, Slayer grabbed a bottle about 3/4 full of Blaire's Ultra Death and went bottoms up...

I think he got about 1/2 way through before ripping the bottle away from his face (it was actually pretty impressive). The look of terror in his eyes was utterly hilarious. Water welled up in his eyes, his nose began to run and he lost complete control over the drool in his mouth. His entire face turned bright red and begun to pour fluids uncontrollably as he frantically searched for a way to stop the pain. He ran to the bathroom where he tried to run his face under the bathtub faucet, but he turned on hot instead of cold :D and apparently couldn't even tell until somebody came in and helped him out. We brought him milk and ice etc, whatever he moaned at us to bring him, his words were those of a man who could barely use his own tongue. Of course he threw up a few times and didn't regain ability to control his drooling and tears etc for about 45 minutes. He didn't look so hot for the rest of the night.

All he told me about the next morning was that an ice bath was involved :P

Epilogue: I refused to pay him since he didn't finish the bottle. God I'm a good friend.
 
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