🎵 I get knocked down, but I get up again 🎵

Not sure if any of you recognize my name, but I'm the guy who insists on growing tropical peppers in a frigid Canadian wasteland. And fails. Over. And over. And over. And over. And over. And over. And over.

I think summer falls on a Tuesday this year, so I'm wildly optimistic!

I had a bunch of plants started in my basement, waiting for last frost. Then i went away for a week for a work thing, and everything rained for two+ weeks, and the humidity coalesced into the physical form of the grim reaper and slaughtered a bunch of my poor babies.

I went to a nursery and bought a bunch of replacements of various varieties.

The rain continued, humidity skyrocketed, and half of these replacements rotted and fell over.

So what am I growing at this point?

I have no gorramned idea.

There are some scotch bonnets, habaneros, reapers, jalapeños.... strawberries. Tomatoes. Raspberries. A rose bush. I think there's a goddamn eggplant somewhere in there. The lilac hasn't died yet, so it gets an honorary mention.

In what quantities?

No idea for most of them.

But what the scheiße, let's make a glog.

...why do I do this to myself?

Hope springs eternal, anguish is infinite.

 

[The Hot Pepper]

 

[Wulf]

 

[Wulf]

The star of today's Pepper of the Day segment is:

Planty!

This plicky little fellow and his never-say-die attitude have inspired billions around the globe with his absolute refusal to actually die!

When asked "what is he", his owner shrugged confusedly and wandered away muttering.

Here's wishing him a productive season, despite appearances and all logic indicating otherwise!

 

[THeGAME101]

I donno about peppers, but Im pretty sure I played Unreal Tournament in that castle

 

[Wulf]

Good news everybody, Planty is finding his groove!

Look at that strapping young lad! Full of pith, and vinegar! And he's all outta pith!

...and vinegar!

Aside from that, this is kind of the boring phase of gardening. But good news, I haven't managed to kill things yet!

But I'm also stupid, and didn't put either thick enough mulch, or put a weed barrier under it before applying, so now I've just got grass and weeds growing up through it. I poke the worst of it with a rake, but mostly i just stare at it and die inside.

I'll do... something. Eventually.

I've also made garden friends!

I think I'll call this guy The Huginator. I bet he gives the spiciest hugs once we get to know each other better.

Until then, he stands guard over my garden with his friends. Like some sort of... Guarden.

Stay tuned for future riveting updates!