When I was young, Tabasco appalled me. I couldn't believe my dad would put it on his eggs. In the summer of '77, I was abducted by aliens. In addition to the anal probe, they stuck something down my throat. Whatever they did, it desensitized both areas to capsaicin. Soon afterwards, I found myself craving Tabasco and was soon out-pouring my dad. During high school, I graduated to Salsa Brava, Pico Pica, and a few Mexican label habanero sauces. I'd also indulge in spicy restaurant food. I remember one of my first girlfriends cooking me Kung Pao chicken with peppers bought at the store. Every year, about this time, I start craving super hot peppers and food. The Perseid Meteor shower during August reminds me of my alien friends. When I see a falling star, I often wonder if they are coming back for me.