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An Englishman, an Irishman, a Welshman and a Scot

talas

talas

An Englishman, an Irishman, a Welshman and a Scot are captured by the Iraqis.
The Iraq troop leader says, "we're going to shoot you, but we will give you one last request."
He says to the Welshman, "what's your last request?"
The Welshman says, "I want a thousand Welshman singing 'Land of my Fathers'."
"Okay, you've got it. What about you?" he says to the Scotsman.
"I want a thousand Scots pipers piping Scotland the brave," says the Scot.
"You've got it" says the Iraqi. "What's your last request?" he says to the Irishman.
"I want a thousand Irishman doing the Riverdance" says Paddy.
"It's yours" says the Iraqi. Turning to the Englishman, he says, "and your last request?"
The Englishman says, "f``k``g shoot me first".
 
An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman are drowning their sorrows down the pub.

"I can't believe it." says the Englishman. "Me and the wife- we've been together 15 years and today I found out she's been having an affair with a builder."

"How do you know it was a builder?" the others ask.

"I found a box of tools under the bed."

"Join the club." says the Scotsman. "Today, I found out my wife's been having an affair with a milkman."

"How do you know it was a milkman?" the others ask.

"I found a crate of milk under the bed."

"You as well?" asks the Irishman. "I've just found out the wife was having an affair with a fo``in horse!"

The other two look at him incredulously. "How do you know it was a horse?"

"I found a jockey hiding under the bed."
 
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