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Burgers? Hell Yeah!!

Hey y'all looking through the sacred THP scrolls it is apparent that most awesome of foods is sorely neglected. That's right chidren's, I'm talkin' about BURGERS!! Sliders. Pub burgers. Fast food style burgers. Gastro burgers. Cheffy burgers. CHEESEBURGERS!!! Single and double meat. Triple meat. Extreme burgers. Man vs. Food burgers....the list is endless but y'all get the idea.

We won't go into the endless arguments of who created the first hamburger (Fletcher Davis) or what meat qualifies as a burger. Nonetheless....here are the rules for posting in this soon to be awesome thread:

1. Any meat goes. Beef, chicken, pork, lamb, rat, fish. Whatever, hunt it down and kill it with a knife. Its all good and I've included the options other than the traditional beef so all the kids can play in the pool. If its ground and round, its all good.

2. The damn 'thang has to be between 2 slices of bread or bun. White bread. Brioche. Sourdough. English muffin. Whole wheat. Its got to be bready. No wrap crap or wild pizza dough like chingaderra's.

3. Any cooking method goes. Grilled. Broiled. Griddled. Steamed. Deep fried. Zippo lighter.

4. Because I love to ridicule to no end tree hugging granola wimps and hippy's.....
Veggie burgers are all good. Just be prepared for the woe and gnashing of teeth and smack talk that will soon come if you post it. It will be all in fun and all good.

5. You suck at cooking? The only thing that would suck more is if you posted pics of your restaurant burger. For the sake of keeping the comedy rolling...
Any burger you didn't cook or you bought is allowed and is all good. Warning: while allowed, posting pics of BK burgers or their ilk with a splash of tabasco will bring upon you the most ridicule and insults. Even more than a veggie burger!

6. Chile's and/or hotsauce is mandatory on the burger. ON the burger, no crap on the side.

7. Pics are mandatory. No posting about a burger you made or ate without pics. You will suffer extreme ridicule and experience much loathing. Just don't do it.

8. Include a list of condiments and toppings. Mayo. Mustard. Onions. Cheese. Extract of male baboon spermatazoa. Whatever. Post it.

There it is y'all. Can you get down brown with it? Allrighty then...

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Here's mine. Sliders. 80/20 ground chuck from Matador Meat Market, Frisco, Tx. Cooked over fine diced yellow onions in cast iron using the smash technique. Toasted Pepperidge Farm slider buns with mustard, the onions, dill pickle and jalapeno pickle slices. Kraft brand American Plastic Cheese.

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Adult beverages are encouraged in the pics but not mandatory. Dig that awesome cast iron crust sear!

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So bring on your burgers. And that means those damn Aussie's and their stinkin' beet root too!!
 
Thegreenchilemonster said:
Nothing quite like eating a big meal in a gentlemans club!
 
 
"Gentlemans Club".
 
Negative.
 
Its a strip joint.
 
Nothing gentlemanly about it.
 
Its strippers.
 
Money.
 
Hookers.
 
Blow.
 
And ten dollar shitty bottled beer.
 
But the thirty dollar microwaved pizza....
 
Is pretty dang' guud'!!!!
 
That is....
 
What they say.
 
In the documentary I saw on online.
 
The Hot Pepper said:
Nah, no preview. Just Slider Saturday. This ain't takin' Sum down but it's tasty.


You gotta start with the right bun. Dig.

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Next up get your burger topping going (jalapenos, vidalias, olive oil, dash of red wine vinegar, sea salt). Saute until soft.

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Grill up the sliders (ground chuck patties with various dried peppers, sea salt) with a hit of olive oil to attract the flame, to a perfect MR. Two thick slices of Extra sharp Vermont cheddar. Toast the buns.

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Assemble the bad boys with:
Peach habanero jam on top bun.
Burger topping on top of cheese.
Roasted (on grill) Roma tomatoes
Garlic dill

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Money

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Jus' cuz.
 
This is the THP I like to be liking.
 
Extry sharp cheddar.
 
Toasted buns.
 
Grilled romas.
 
Fast forward to 2018.
 
Thats a $30 burger at Flemings steak joint.
 
Hear me now.
 
'Bleed me later.
 
Animal Style.
 
Cheeseburger.
 
 
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Mustard and onion.
 
Smashed into the meat.
 
Kings Hawaiian buns.
 
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Special sauce.
 
Pickled peno's.
 
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Make some queso.
 
Dunk some pickled peno's.
 
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Make another burger.
 
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Eat it.
 
 
I love cheeseburgers.
 
 
 
 
 

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The Count said:
F-it, Im making burgers tonight

Nicely done TB. I love a double double animal style burger!
 
Back in the day of the dinosaur and troglodyte.
 
When mrs. blues and I lived in the big dry ditch of Las Vegas.
 
We loved the INO joint on Tropicana and Dean Martin.
 
These days I order the exact burger.
 
As I did back then.
 
Now we go to the INO on Preston in Frisco, TX.
 
Its the exact same got dang goodern' fornificatin' as hell burger.
 
Single cheese.
 
Animal Style.
 
No lettuce.
 
Well done fries animal style.
 
And 9 INO chiles.
 
From the ketchup and napkin bar.
 
mrs. blues also always orders the same 'thang.
 
That she always likes to be liking.
 
Single cheese.
 
Mustard and pickles only.
 
Regular fries.
 
And a neapolitan shake.
 
 
Count.
 
You buzz over to Austin for INO?
 
Or south to San Antone?
 
 
I'm a native Texan.
 
Some Texans 'bleed that I am a heretic.
 
A blasphemer.
 
For not worshiping at the altar of Whataburger.
 
IDGAF.
 
Did Davy Crockett?
 
When the Japanese bombed The Alamo?
 
Hell no!!!
 
We go south to the one in north San Antonio, I have never been to one in Austin.

I do not eat at Whataburger since they took a stand against my state given right to open carry a pistol. Ten or so years ago their A1 thick and hearty burger was my hangover food
 
The Count said:
I had to hold off on burgers until this Friday or Saturday night, my Mother in law is coming up and she likes my burgers. Unfortunately they will not have Ranch or pineapple
 
The bestest burger I ever made.
 
I ground my own chuck.
 
Cast ironed.
 
Salted.
 
Smashed with onions.
 
On a toasted squishy bun.
 
No cheese.
 
No ranch.
 
No pineapple.
 
Love the one you're with.
 
Damn dude!!!! Them fries like hand cut and fresh out of a fry daddy!
 
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