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The Drunken Chef

Hey ya'll once again from the big dry ditch of Las Vegas. I had picked up some beautiful chix I wanted to deep fry but soon discovered I didn't have enough oil. Why not just drive down to the local grub store and buy it you ask? BECAUSE I WAS PISS DRUNK!! Alrighty then. I grab the bottle of Hornitos tequila and ready myself to begin the destruction. I fire up the cast iron dutch oven and just start throwing stuff in. Olive oil. Garilc. Julieanned shallot. Chix thighs. Gets a little blurry here but I somehow managed to debone the thighs without chopping off my leg but then all good cooks should be able to pull that off. The vast majority of experienced kitchen rats and riffraff cook much better after a bottle of wine or three. Those of you reading this keep that little kitchen tip in mind, especially when family from out of town is around. If the wife is chewing your ass the next day for your drunken lewd and lascivious behavior in the kitchen the previous night, then you know you must have made a helluva meal and did it right.

Continuing on, I soon missplaced my shot glass and decided to dispensed with it all together. Why should tequila have to go through a middleman anyway. Liquors quicker straight from the bottle. I discovered I had a stash of dried pequins from last season and bada bing bada boom in they went. Same with some forlorn looking button mushrooms. Whirring and stirring with a spoon in one hand and the bottle of firewater in the other, why not deglaze the pan with tequila? Excellent idea! Might as well get rid of the rest of the hab salsa I made the other day. In that goes, adios baby! Add some seasalt and cracked black pepper. Whir and stir. Taste. It tastes like burning. Nice.

Somehow during this culinary rampage I managed to take a few pics.

The beginning of the end...

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I think this was chicken..


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Stewing in its own juices, just like me..

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I can't be sure but I think I ate it with tortilla's but who can say. This morning as I looked at the devastation in the Blues Kitchen I reckoned that were I to detonate a hundred pounds of C4
in the middle of it I would only cause about $21.47 worth of damage. Mrs. Blues was not amused but and well acquainted with my late night shenanigans. Ahhh marital bliss.

Now that I have started this thread, I call on all you THP drunks, sots, and gin blossomed heathens to keep it going. Pics are mandatory and it goes without saying that rule number one is...YOU MUST BE DRUNK WHEN COOKING!!

So get the divorce papers ready, get your favorite bottle of liquid stupid and get cookin' ya'll!

Cheers, TB.
 
Okay, that does it....this Summer's new goal...I'm gonna learn to make sushi!!!! That looked all kinds of right to me TB!!!!! And there isn't a sushi roll within 70 miles from me right now....dammit.
 
That's my gerl!!!!! :)

Go make up some ramen with eggs.....have you tried it with hard boiled eggs???? I love it! But then, I like tofu too...so maybe don't listen to me..... ;)
 
I feel like Chicken tonight So,

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marinating in a Garlic and Herb while the chef get's his Sailor Jerry on

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Prep work done and

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a little saute

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add in green beans

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and a splash of lemon

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taters going

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chicken on the barbie

so good I missed getting a plate shot.
 
I added Fatali powder to the marinade and there was some powdered Aji Habanero I'm the taters. That's what happens when there's too much Sailor before Cookin.

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Damn RM, you got me wanting to bust out the grill. TB never pegged you for a sushi guy, plus it’s too hard to make when drunk, just throw all the ingredient in a bowl, sprinkle with soy and wasabi, stick a fork in it and done.

So I had to use up my prosciutto before it went bad, and these ingredients I had on hand, in fact I didn’t even have bread crumbs, I made those out of stale hot dog and hoagie buns. So this is my pantry raid version of chicken saltimbocca.

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Prep, I cut a pocket in the chicken, lined it with the prosciutto allowing enough extra to cover the slit once it was stuffed with Prov., Mozz., asiago and parm.

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Ready to go into the oven - Floured, dipped in seasoned eggs and the coated with bread crumbs.

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$hot, I fire roasted the Manzanos, skinned and diced them then sprinkled on top.

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Very tasty, but not enough heat.
 
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