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contest August Throwdown

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Those motherfuckers took 4 Yukon Golds right in the face and genitals. Then they just sat there, slowly fading.
We went inside to reload with some Fingerlings, and when we came back they were gone.

...For Good.

And someone threw a bicycle in the tree.
 
I think I'm going to use "And someone threw a bicycle in the tree" to sum up a story about any function that I attend that went totally mangoes.
 
I think I'm going to use "And someone threw a bicycle in the tree" to sum up a story about any function that I attend that went totally mangoes.

That would actually work with any sentence.

"I tripped over some of missylou's kitty toys this morning and nearly broke my hip....and someone threw a bicycle in the tree."
 
"I'm sorry ma'am. We can't seem to find your husband. The kidnappers broke into his office and left a bloody note that said he'd never be seen again. We followed their getaway car until it crossed the Mexican border, where it disappeared into the desert sunset.

A lone sidewinder slithered through the sand.

A tumbleweed blew between us and the bad guys.

And someone threw a bicycle in the tree."
 
in my circle of friends it was always "and everything was going great until [someone] got drunk & stuck their dick in the mashed potatoes"

I suppose "bicycle in the tree" is a bit more polite.
:rofl:
 
I wanna change it to "And someone threw a tricycle in a tree."

More accurate per the circumstance.

It was your pink Barbie tricycle, right FD?
 
JayT broke his unicycle in the mashed potatoes.
 
JayT broke his unicycle in the mashed potatoes.

Yeah and it has never been the same. Damn it.

Yeah well, at least yours is only broke.

I don't even get to leave the house with mine.

TB: Hey honey! I'm going out with a couple of friends for a drink, be back in a couple of hours.

mrs. blues: Well then, you won't be needing POP! this!

TB: C'mon honey! Its just the guys.

mrs. blues: uh huh.

TB: C'mon now...they're all taking theirs!

mrs. blues: Cry me a frikken river. NO!
 
I think pregnant women have some sort of secret mind trick to render our unicycles useless. At least it worked on mine.
 
I think pregnant women have some sort of secret mind trick to render our unicycles useless. At least it worked on mine.

Well it certainly didn't stop you from playing the lead role of Quick Draw McGraw in the movie Invasion of the Babymakers!
 
Paul pulls out his notebook and pen and writes:

Reason #1294 why I'm thankful to be a bachelor........Full control of my unicycle.
 
"Bachelor"

You're right Pauly.

Bachelor sounds so much better than broken and bitter divorcee.



: Frank Sinatra sings in the background :

"When I was seventeen.....it was a very good year....."
 
My friends & I made a potato gun when we were in our late teens. It was more like a friggin cannon - could shoot a potato like 1000 yards. Unbelievable power in those if you seal it up right and use the right fuel & ignition system. we went pretty high-po on the fuel.

After like 20-25 shots though the nastiness started to build up in the fuel resevoir - and subsequently leaked out all over my leg. It was a nastified black sauce of potato juices & fuel and it soaked right into my jeans and burned my leg.

so nasty.

But damn that potato gun could launch a potato.

You can make something similar with tennis ball cans - 2 tennis ball cans duct taped end to end (with the bottom cut off one of course) - punch a hole in the side for the butane nozzle, and shove a tennis ball down the thing. Squirt in a little butane, allow a few moments for evaporation and hold the lighter up to the hole. *THOOM!* it'll send a tennis ball skyward at about 100 mph. It's a lot of fun until the tennis ball catches fire. We ended up chasing a flaming tennis ball down the hill because we thought it'd burn someone's house down. Fortunately if you have 2 cans, that's 6 tennis balls! :dance:
 
No unicycle for me, a tricycle has more stability and lower center of gravity, I'll go with that.
I'm proud to be associated with you John Holmes unicyclists.

As for the tater cannon program that I was privy to witness.... No comment, other than...

Holyshitthatmustahurt!
 
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