Here we go with reviews
once again, the winner is Ozzy
he is either cheating by pouring other peoples beers into his labeled bottles, or completely copy pasta-ing recipes from homebrew sites (which is not a bad idea, because his technique is flawless) and using his own techniques
sorry if this causes problems, or animosity, I am just the reviewer and call it as I taste it
TC TEN TEN
Something Something Donald Trump Something Worst Presidential Candidate ever Something Stout
Category: Golden Stout
6/12 Aroma: Lactic acid, strawberry, banana, mango, peaches, thought it was a berlinerweiss. Smells incredibly awesome, if it was a Berliner. However it is not a berliner, since it is supposed to be a golden stout
2/3 Appearance: Perfect color. Good clarity. No head retention, but still minimal lacing
10/20 Flavor: Fruit dominant, with a slight metallic tinge at the end. Some spiced flavor, but probably from the lacto infection. All the stout characteristics have been washed away.
3/5 Mouthfeel: rich and thick like the beer should be, but on the edge of roapy, indicative of a LAB infection. If you take this beer and toss in a bret Brux or Anomalus strain, and let it sit for 6 months, you will have a 48/50 american sour ale
5/10 Overall: Dude when I tasted this the other day, I was like FUCK YEA STRAWBERRY IN A STOUT! And I am going to use white chocolate in another beer thanks to this idea. And now that I have gotten rid of the cold, I realized why. Bad infection combined with high fermentation temperatures led to this beer just running rampant. Honestly if you would have thrown this in a Berliner or American sour ale category, as of right now, it would be pretty decent. It is going to get worse, so drink it now.
26/50: I hate to be an asshole, because your sauces are some of the best ive ever had, and your food for the TDs is on point. But until you get the fermentation temp in check, it’s going to be difficult. That is your biggest most difficult hurdle. That can absolutely affect a wild infection running rampant too. The less control over your temps, the more of an ideal environment you create for any random creepy crawlies to get in there and do their horrible thing.
Ozzy 2001
Something Something Golden Stout Something Balls In Your Face Something
Category: Golden Stout
11/12 Aroma: Chocolate, Cocoa, Coffee, and Nougat. Its like a cake in a glass.
1/3 Appearance: Head Renention is baller, color is way dark, and as cloudy as a New England IPA, like gravy
18/20 Flavor: I don’t understand how you do this on a home brew level. Absolutely nothing bad to say about this beer. Reminds me of chocolate whipped cream, vanilla cappuccino, a lingering ice cream and childhood memory from each sip. I told you this in the PM I sent you, but either 1. You are cheating, or 2. You should come make beer with me.
4/5 mouthfeel: Creamy and smooth, like a nitrogenated coffee.
8/10 Overall: Better than your tripel, and tied with the other best home brewed beer I ever had, which was a pilsner. Fucking spectacular.
42/50 - MAKE IT PRETTY LOOKING!!!!!
Grantmichaels – Something Something kissing and fisting something or other you are ugly
8/12 Aroma - Everything is there, but I really have to search for ingredients. If I did not see your recipe, it would have taken me hours to figure out what that was. Coffee is there, but subdued. For a beer called a Golden Stout, even though there are no real style guidelines, I want to smell and taste a full on stout.
2/3 Appearance – Baller head (giggity). Amazing head retention and foam characteristics, the best beer ive seen yet from these competitions. It is just dark. Like too dark, like amber ale dark. Clarity is more than acceptable.
16/20 Flavor – That fusel I talked about isn’t TOTALLY gone, but not nearly as dominant as I thought it was when I had the first bottle. It was probably the cold medicine I was chugging. Subtle cocoa, subtle coffee, but I can’t shake the remindings of like a double malt colt 45. I mean it reminds me very much like that. Huge dextrins and long chain sugars. It is very “beery”. Very subdued esters, lager-ish characteristics. Slight DMS. It actually took me the 20 minutes or so writing this review to pick it out as it warmed up, but its there. I am not gonna dock you on points, as typically you wouldn’t take this long to review a beer from a BJCP or WBC standpoint, but know that its there.
4/5 Mouthfeel – Rich in dextrins. Hence the reason it reminded me of colt 45. Lots of unbroken sugar chains. Perfect for a stout. And good carbonation. I have only ever rated one beer a perfect mouthfeel before, and that was that pilsner that I compared Ozzy’s beer to.
7/10 Overall – I think this is more my fault than your fault. I always tell you to be subtle with the coffee, and subtle with the spices, however in a beer like this, its basically the opposite. The nature of the style is subtle malt bill, but huge everything else to make up for that small subtlety.
36/50 Total Score.
JBeer- Something Something Vanilla Chocolate Power weird Jalapeno Something beer
8/12 Aroma – Coffee dominates, but I get a weird aroma of jalapenos or other peppers. I hope there wasn’t a cross contamination of some sorts. Note to everyone. Stop doing tinctures. They leave flavors and smells behind when you are incorporating them into only 5 gallons or less of beer.
2/3 Appearance. Color is spot on. Foam is great, head retention is great, lacing isn’t there. Dies very quickly
15/20 Flavor – Coffee is the dominant note, which is awesome, but everything else falls by the wayside. Nothing really melds together really well, but everything fits pleasantly. I am detecting something weird, but I have no idea what it is. It isn’t a usual flavor I would find with something going bad during the process.
3/5 Mouthfeel – A little lackluster on the body. Which is odd because I see your grain bill which looks great. Maybe could have increased that mash temp by 2-3 degrees to hit that big body. Might want to look in to your water profile and your chloride levels on that one.
7/10 Overall – Not bad at all. I liked it, and it fit in the category, but it was missing more chocolate and more roast. As I said to grant in his review, it was probably my fault on this one because I have been engraining all of you with the “subtle is better” mentality, except for a beer like this where you have to just throw it all out there because that is the definition of the style
35/50 Total
Ozzy =)