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Burgers? Hell Yeah!!

Hey y'all looking through the sacred THP scrolls it is apparent that most awesome of foods is sorely neglected. That's right chidren's, I'm talkin' about BURGERS!! Sliders. Pub burgers. Fast food style burgers. Gastro burgers. Cheffy burgers. CHEESEBURGERS!!! Single and double meat. Triple meat. Extreme burgers. Man vs. Food burgers....the list is endless but y'all get the idea.

We won't go into the endless arguments of who created the first hamburger (Fletcher Davis) or what meat qualifies as a burger. Nonetheless....here are the rules for posting in this soon to be awesome thread:

1. Any meat goes. Beef, chicken, pork, lamb, rat, fish. Whatever, hunt it down and kill it with a knife. Its all good and I've included the options other than the traditional beef so all the kids can play in the pool. If its ground and round, its all good.

2. The damn 'thang has to be between 2 slices of bread or bun. White bread. Brioche. Sourdough. English muffin. Whole wheat. Its got to be bready. No wrap crap or wild pizza dough like chingaderra's.

3. Any cooking method goes. Grilled. Broiled. Griddled. Steamed. Deep fried. Zippo lighter.

4. Because I love to ridicule to no end tree hugging granola wimps and hippy's.....
Veggie burgers are all good. Just be prepared for the woe and gnashing of teeth and smack talk that will soon come if you post it. It will be all in fun and all good.

5. You suck at cooking? The only thing that would suck more is if you posted pics of your restaurant burger. For the sake of keeping the comedy rolling...
Any burger you didn't cook or you bought is allowed and is all good. Warning: while allowed, posting pics of BK burgers or their ilk with a splash of tabasco will bring upon you the most ridicule and insults. Even more than a veggie burger!

6. Chile's and/or hotsauce is mandatory on the burger. ON the burger, no crap on the side.

7. Pics are mandatory. No posting about a burger you made or ate without pics. You will suffer extreme ridicule and experience much loathing. Just don't do it.

8. Include a list of condiments and toppings. Mayo. Mustard. Onions. Cheese. Extract of male baboon spermatazoa. Whatever. Post it.

There it is y'all. Can you get down brown with it? Allrighty then...

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Here's mine. Sliders. 80/20 ground chuck from Matador Meat Market, Frisco, Tx. Cooked over fine diced yellow onions in cast iron using the smash technique. Toasted Pepperidge Farm slider buns with mustard, the onions, dill pickle and jalapeno pickle slices. Kraft brand American Plastic Cheese.

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Adult beverages are encouraged in the pics but not mandatory. Dig that awesome cast iron crust sear!

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So bring on your burgers. And that means those damn Aussie's and their stinkin' beet root too!!
 
I moved this post (below now lol) over here so it doesn't affect voting in the poll. :)
 
That's a nice rendition of your patty! Well done. I love the sauce waterfall.
 
Choice. Looks killer in daylight ...
 
Wish I could have captured mine in daylight, too ...
 
I'd planned for the golden light, which is very late right now, but the smoking took longer than anticipated because potato leek soup is dense ...
JoynersHotPeppers said:
He will be pleased Cabot showed me love already ;)
 
@Grant
 
Haha ... I haven't shown Rachel my black meaty bidness yet ... haha ...
 
I went with @patlafrieda ...
 
grantmichaels said:
Choice. Looks killer in daylight ...
 
Wish I could have captured mine in daylight, too ...
 
I'd planned for the golden light, which is very late right now, but the smoking took longer than anticipated because potato leek soup is dense ...
Same for me, that storm ruined my golden hour chance to shoot. 
grantmichaels said:
Choice. Looks killer in daylight ...
 
Wish I could have captured mine in daylight, too ...
 
I'd planned for the golden light, which is very late right now, but the smoking took longer than anticipated because potato leek soup is dense ...

 
Haha ... I haven't shown Rachel my black meaty bidness yet ... haha ...
 
I went with @patlafrieda ...
I think her twin hit me up this time, no signature hahaha
 
JoynersHotPeppers said:
Same for me, that storm ruined my golden hour chance to shoot. 
 
Mine tasted really good, but two things sucked in terms of presentation, beyond missing the daylight:
 
1) the knife smeared the grain from the burger, and there weren't enough picture slots to display it again ...
2) the mushroom gills darkened the soup more than I'd anticipated they would ...
 
Wonder if we should do a photography TD. Vote for best pic of food. Ha, then people would complain that people are voting for the food.
 
However it could be a cool one. Bierz, PIC 1, JHP, Grant have all posted some real gems.. TD time, people are often in the dark or drunk... just saying it could be very interesting. There could be required angles or subject matter.
 
grantmichaels said:
 
Mine tasted really good, but two things sucked in terms of presentation, beyond missing the daylight:
 
1) the knife smeared the grain from the burger, and there weren't enough picture slots to display it again ...
2) the mushroom gills darkened the soup more than I'd anticipated they would ...
 
 
Specifically did mine to finish during the day so I could take pics outside.  It clearly makes a difference......but 5 or so hours to make a stinking burger.....
 
The Hot Pepper said:
Wonder if we should do a photography TD. Vote for best pic of food. Ha, then people would complain that people are voting for the food.
 
However it could be a cool one. Bierz, PIC 1, JHP, Grant have all posted some real gems.. TD time, people are often in the dark or drunk... just saying it could be very interesting. There could be required angles or subject matter.
 
Do it as a solo comp away from the TD series, more like a wing challenge, with a little camera icon bling, and let's do it a couple of times of the year, with the item totally open ...
 
That would be wayyyy cool.
 
tctenten said:
 
 
Specifically did mine to finish during the day so I could take pics outside.  It clearly makes a difference......but 5 or so hours to make a stinking burger.....
 
Haha ... I literally spent the weekend, from Friday until late Sunday night ...
 
Worth it? ... Truly, hell to nizzoh ... but every now and again I can't help myself and gotta ...
 
I've had the Modernist salts here for a year, and the Moo Gloo, and the whole baking buns thing ... all things I'd been putting off one cook after the next, now water under the bridge ...
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQ9_TKayu9s
 
I wanted to see what "Santa" brought you but I guess I'll have to wait... that looks like a fun summer device anyway...
 
Yeah for the actual SM style but also it is very versatile and mimics other style contraptions in other countries where you cook open air and you can do many things...
 
Won't say more lol.
 
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