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Burgers? Hell Yeah!!

Hey y'all looking through the sacred THP scrolls it is apparent that most awesome of foods is sorely neglected. That's right chidren's, I'm talkin' about BURGERS!! Sliders. Pub burgers. Fast food style burgers. Gastro burgers. Cheffy burgers. CHEESEBURGERS!!! Single and double meat. Triple meat. Extreme burgers. Man vs. Food burgers....the list is endless but y'all get the idea.

We won't go into the endless arguments of who created the first hamburger (Fletcher Davis) or what meat qualifies as a burger. Nonetheless....here are the rules for posting in this soon to be awesome thread:

1. Any meat goes. Beef, chicken, pork, lamb, rat, fish. Whatever, hunt it down and kill it with a knife. Its all good and I've included the options other than the traditional beef so all the kids can play in the pool. If its ground and round, its all good.

2. The damn 'thang has to be between 2 slices of bread or bun. White bread. Brioche. Sourdough. English muffin. Whole wheat. Its got to be bready. No wrap crap or wild pizza dough like chingaderra's.

3. Any cooking method goes. Grilled. Broiled. Griddled. Steamed. Deep fried. Zippo lighter.

4. Because I love to ridicule to no end tree hugging granola wimps and hippy's.....
Veggie burgers are all good. Just be prepared for the woe and gnashing of teeth and smack talk that will soon come if you post it. It will be all in fun and all good.

5. You suck at cooking? The only thing that would suck more is if you posted pics of your restaurant burger. For the sake of keeping the comedy rolling...
Any burger you didn't cook or you bought is allowed and is all good. Warning: while allowed, posting pics of BK burgers or their ilk with a splash of tabasco will bring upon you the most ridicule and insults. Even more than a veggie burger!

6. Chile's and/or hotsauce is mandatory on the burger. ON the burger, no crap on the side.

7. Pics are mandatory. No posting about a burger you made or ate without pics. You will suffer extreme ridicule and experience much loathing. Just don't do it.

8. Include a list of condiments and toppings. Mayo. Mustard. Onions. Cheese. Extract of male baboon spermatazoa. Whatever. Post it.

There it is y'all. Can you get down brown with it? Allrighty then...

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Here's mine. Sliders. 80/20 ground chuck from Matador Meat Market, Frisco, Tx. Cooked over fine diced yellow onions in cast iron using the smash technique. Toasted Pepperidge Farm slider buns with mustard, the onions, dill pickle and jalapeno pickle slices. Kraft brand American Plastic Cheese.

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Adult beverages are encouraged in the pics but not mandatory. Dig that awesome cast iron crust sear!

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So bring on your burgers. And that means those damn Aussie's and their stinkin' beet root too!!
 
Decided to do some sliders tonight. Almost threw in some bacon but got lazy (and drunk). Fresh ground 93/7, did the onion smash, muenster of course, mayo and Sriracha, double stacked on golden potato buns!



I do apologize about the crappy counter tile again but these didnt last 1 minute!
:edit: seasoned with course sea salt and cracked pepper
 
texas blues said:
Holy crap!
 
The Aussie Posse is rockin' it harder than penitentiary steel y'all!
 
Talk about some mouf' waterin' goodnessess.
 
Ever see a bulldog eatin' a bowl of mayonaisse?
 
What's the name of that thickass bacon y'all using?
We just call it Middle Bacon.

Hard to find bacon cuts that you guys use, really want some if that long even bacon so I can get my weave on
 
Those look pretty "meaty" for smashed sliders Jay.
 
And succulent too.
 
I also like that you didn't put all kine'o foo foo on em' too.
 
Leave the arugula and fancy lettuce crap for the sissy cheffy burgers.
 
Pretty hot. They were two Jamaican Hot Yellow peppers. In the last bites, remove some slices, did not hold much.
Bread is a pettit shop, where they make homemade style bakery very high quality. It was delicious
 
cypresshill1973 said:
 
Pretty hot. They were two Jamaican Hot Yellow peppers. In the last bites, remove some slices, did not hold much.
Bread is a pettit shop, where they make homemade style bakery very high quality. It was delicious
 
 
Oh you bought the bun?
 
Boooooo!
 
Home Made means that YOU made it.
 
However.
 
You get bonus points for admitting that you had to remove some chiles because it was so hot.
 
I reckon many folks here on THP do that but NEVER admit it.
 
And while I'm not a fan of using a burger press, it can still produce a pretty dang guud burger.
 
It looked dang delicious and I'd eat the hell out of it.
 
Salute' Senor!
 
You sir speak the truth.
 
As much as I have baked my own bread and buns, I can't seem to bake a bun thats as good as a store bought squishy bun.
 
And in fact, the best burgers I've ever eaten were from 100% store bought buns.
 
I reckon that maybe that is endeavor I should pursue to discover how to make at home better than can be bought.
 
I'm on it.
 
My mother makes incredible bread. It makes them soft and flavored butter. When we visit and cooking bread, I keep in the freezer a few. 
The secret is not to overcook and hand kneading, of course ...
 
I put NO effort into this...it was just so damn good I had to REJOICE with my THP friends. 
 
I did the smashburger/slider method for the first time. 
 
Loose meat (my high school nickname), ice cream scooped into a Hot Black Skillet (Sum's high school nickname).
Smashed, add onions, salt, pepper...let it Maillard for a little bit, flip
Serve on Potato Roll. 
I slapped some bleu cheese and man-gravy on mine. 
 
This was so good I let it do mouth-anal to my face-hole!!!
 
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I totally buy the HotBS HS nickname but "Hot Black"? Um... I call BS. Hahahahahahahahahahaha literally... I am calling him rite now! Hahahahahahahahaha

Nice slider there FD... "Smash Meat". (Which I want to believe is your current nickname).

BOOM!
 
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