The Drunken Chef

Hey ya'll once again from the big dry ditch of Las Vegas. I had picked up some beautiful chix I wanted to deep fry but soon discovered I didn't have enough oil. Why not just drive down to the local grub store and buy it you ask? BECAUSE I WAS PISS DRUNK!! Alrighty then. I grab the bottle of Hornitos tequila and ready myself to begin the destruction. I fire up the cast iron dutch oven and just start throwing stuff in. Olive oil. Garilc. Julieanned shallot. Chix thighs. Gets a little blurry here but I somehow managed to debone the thighs without chopping off my leg but then all good cooks should be able to pull that off. The vast majority of experienced kitchen rats and riffraff cook much better after a bottle of wine or three. Those of you reading this keep that little kitchen tip in mind, especially when family from out of town is around. If the wife is chewing your ass the next day for your drunken lewd and lascivious behavior in the kitchen the previous night, then you know you must have made a helluva meal and did it right.

Continuing on, I soon missplaced my shot glass and decided to dispensed with it all together. Why should tequila have to go through a middleman anyway. Liquors quicker straight from the bottle. I discovered I had a stash of dried pequins from last season and bada bing bada boom in they went. Same with some forlorn looking button mushrooms. Whirring and stirring with a spoon in one hand and the bottle of firewater in the other, why not deglaze the pan with tequila? Excellent idea! Might as well get rid of the rest of the hab salsa I made the other day. In that goes, adios baby! Add some seasalt and cracked black pepper. Whir and stir. Taste. It tastes like burning. Nice.

Somehow during this culinary rampage I managed to take a few pics.

The beginning of the end...

I think this was chicken..

Stewing in its own juices, just like me..

I can't be sure but I think I ate it with tortilla's but who can say. This morning as I looked at the devastation in the Blues Kitchen I reckoned that were I to detonate a hundred pounds of C4
in the middle of it I would only cause about $21.47 worth of damage. Mrs. Blues was not amused but and well acquainted with my late night shenanigans. Ahhh marital bliss.

Now that I have started this thread, I call on all you THP drunks, sots, and gin blossomed heathens to keep it going. Pics are mandatory and it goes without saying that rule number one is...YOU MUST BE DRUNK WHEN COOKING!!

So get the divorce papers ready, get your favorite bottle of liquid stupid and get cookin' ya'll!

Cheers, TB.

 

[salsalady]

I gotta get me one of those!!!!

I like extra green onion garnish on my dishes. Can it hold a tablespoon of that?

FD4- I'm sure you can find a larger one for the green onions, but after being packed around on a keychain for a few weeks until it's needed in a culinary emergency........

 

[SumOfMyBits]

So the SoFlo Posse took a trip to South Point Park on South Beach. We were hanging out around Smith & Wollensky's waiting for the cruise ships to depart. My mom was on one and I told her I'd take pictures of them partying on their balcony as they set sail for a week. That was fun, but the bigger question was... what do we do now?

Drunken Chef it up.

I think it might have been 5'O that turned us on to Memphis Nachos a while back. We may have even posted some once before, but these things are so damn tasty and so easy to make we felt it was the thing to do on a lazy drunken day like today was turning out to be.

There are some crab legs in there. They were for MrsFD, but we decided to include them in the pic because crab legs are cool.

Serranos from the SumBit's garden. I know... not fair... I can sow seed whenever I want.

Have to give a shout out to Geeme tonight for hooking us up with some seeds. They came in today. We tossed back some Busch Lights in your name.

Lit up some coals and threw on the pork cuts, but FD [drunk] after cleaning out the old ash left the bottom vents closed... and we put out our coals, doh!

No worries... that's what tin foil and the oven is for. Hell, if JayT can make oven ribs...

It all turned out fine. Take a gander.

Firsts.

Seconds!!!

Good times.

SoFlo

 

[texas blues]

Drunk it up indeed. Good 'Gawd I gotta' cook and fish with y'all. I 'ma puttin' in my request for a SoFlo posting of Florida lobster nacho's...or a SoFlo seafood reuben. SoFlo rules!

 

[midwestchilehead]

Damn, SL, that looks good! May have to hit the thai place tomorrow. Good job!

Here' you go!
chicken, veggies, a habanero, sambal, garlic, coconut milk, Chinese-style noodles, cilantro-

 

[JayT]

Sum that may be the single best spread of food porn I have ever seen! Holy crap!

 

[geeme]

Aw shucks.... thanks Sum!

 

[geeme]

Something with Tamarind

The goods, except the shrimps and seasonings out of the cabinet:

The tamarind, Zipang Sake, curry paste, coconut milk, and ginger went into a sautee pan, along with garlic, red hab powder, paprika, sea salt and a touch of fish base.
Veggies were stir-fried, with shrimps added at the end:

Strained the tamarind sauce to remove seeds, etc.
Final dish, over Japanese Udon noodles, plus sake on the side:

So how was it? Good, but I felt like it was missing something. Definitely had the hot and sour going, but I haven't yet decided what to do differently next time.

The Zipang? Nice, easy to drink. Yummers.....
I chose this because being bubbly, it is somewhat sweeter than traditional sake, which I wanted to offset the sourness of the tamarind. Could have gone with mirin, but I didn't want to get quite that sweet.

 

[SumOfMyBits]

Nice lookin' Skrump Doughnuts G.

I'd go with sweet Tamarinds next time. They're sweet with tang, and pepper heat on that werks.

Werd, SoFlo

 

[Nova]

Very nice geeme, you too sum ovens rule! Yeehaaa

 

[geeme]

I'd go with sweet Tamarinds next time. They're sweet with tang, and pepper heat on that werks.

So far these are the only tamarinds I've found in this area. I understand that tamarind paste is available in a tube, and may well look for that. Gotta admit, getting the pulp off the seeds ain't easy.... though throwing the whole thing into the sake while heating and stirring helped remove it a bit at a time.

 

[chilehunter]

all kickass meals! I'll take all 3 at the same time.

 

[JayT]

Tonight's little snacky. Four cheese nachos with Heartbreaking Dawn's Mango Habanero sauce.

The cheeses are smoked bleu, provolone, swiss, and pepperjack. Then there is prosciutto, roasted red peppers, cilantro, and HBD's sauce. Not hot, but sure tasty! I did put a few drops of Mauvais Sang on a few of the chips to bring up the heat. The drink of choice tonight was (it's gone now) Chardonnay.

 

[SumOfMyBits]

Nachos!!! Just LOOK at those "waterfalls" of cheese. And then there's the foo.

PAPosse has the foo on lock. I remember those old TD posts Wheebz.

JayT ain't bringin' no microwaved hot-dogs up in here tonight!

 

[Nick]

Decided to get drunk and make pasta all'arrabiata last night. It was a half failure, unfortunately. I made it too hot for my girlfriend to eat. It wasn't a total failure though, as I ate her portion.

Forgot to get the scotch bonnet sauce, chile flakes, oregano, etc. in the picture. I was half in the bag by this point, anyways.

Anchovy goodness.

Deglazing with some bad red wine. Half a cup for the sauce, rest of the bottle for the cook.

And done.

 

[LUCKYDOG]

looks kick ass Nick - Are those clove cigs next to the Netflix ?

JayT and Sum - Holy Jalapeno on stick those are some proper nach-olas

And Geeme and SalsaLady - those are rovery Wang Chung delights

 

[paulky_2000]

Damn.....I'm behind on the foodage!!!!

Great lookin' grub, y'all!!!!!

 

[Nick]

Are those clove cigs next to the Netflix ?

Nah, American Spirits. I was pretty wasted by the time I finished it and didn't really bother clearing a space for the picture. Whoops.

 

[frydad4]

Damn Good lookin food everyone!!!
JT Bustin out pan-seared nachos. Is that all-clad? Of course it is!!

I made it too hot for my girlfriend to eat. It wasn't a total failure though, as I ate her...

Damn Nick, I wasn't sure you were going "Portion" there...

Food looks great! Dude, you need more posts up on this place!! Something about your pics makes me thirsty...I know, it's the Busch Light!!!
Get in on the next throwdown!

 

[Nick]

Damn Nick, I wasn't sure you were going "Portion" there...

Food looks great! Dude, you need more posts up on this place!! Something about your pics makes me thirsty...I know, it's the Busch Light!!!
Get in on the next throwdown!

Hah! Didn't drink quite enough for that.

As for the next TD, I'm definitely going to put something out there. It'll probably pale in comparison to SoFlo, but it looks like a ridiculous amount of fun.

 

[frydad4]

but it looks like a ridiculous amount of fun.

Thats the key to it all.
Stay tuned on that thread, THP should announce the rules soon! Can't wait to see what you enter!
BTW, over the years I've had to come up with creative ways to include my wife in these meals too, and she can't really hang with the hot stuff, so I can empathize with what you've been through.
It can be done, even though sometimes it dirties extra dishes!