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The Drunken Chef

Hey ya'll once again from the big dry ditch of Las Vegas. I had picked up some beautiful chix I wanted to deep fry but soon discovered I didn't have enough oil. Why not just drive down to the local grub store and buy it you ask? BECAUSE I WAS PISS DRUNK!! Alrighty then. I grab the bottle of Hornitos tequila and ready myself to begin the destruction. I fire up the cast iron dutch oven and just start throwing stuff in. Olive oil. Garilc. Julieanned shallot. Chix thighs. Gets a little blurry here but I somehow managed to debone the thighs without chopping off my leg but then all good cooks should be able to pull that off. The vast majority of experienced kitchen rats and riffraff cook much better after a bottle of wine or three. Those of you reading this keep that little kitchen tip in mind, especially when family from out of town is around. If the wife is chewing your ass the next day for your drunken lewd and lascivious behavior in the kitchen the previous night, then you know you must have made a helluva meal and did it right.

Continuing on, I soon missplaced my shot glass and decided to dispensed with it all together. Why should tequila have to go through a middleman anyway. Liquors quicker straight from the bottle. I discovered I had a stash of dried pequins from last season and bada bing bada boom in they went. Same with some forlorn looking button mushrooms. Whirring and stirring with a spoon in one hand and the bottle of firewater in the other, why not deglaze the pan with tequila? Excellent idea! Might as well get rid of the rest of the hab salsa I made the other day. In that goes, adios baby! Add some seasalt and cracked black pepper. Whir and stir. Taste. It tastes like burning. Nice.

Somehow during this culinary rampage I managed to take a few pics.

The beginning of the end...

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I think this was chicken..


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Stewing in its own juices, just like me..

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I can't be sure but I think I ate it with tortilla's but who can say. This morning as I looked at the devastation in the Blues Kitchen I reckoned that were I to detonate a hundred pounds of C4
in the middle of it I would only cause about $21.47 worth of damage. Mrs. Blues was not amused but and well acquainted with my late night shenanigans. Ahhh marital bliss.

Now that I have started this thread, I call on all you THP drunks, sots, and gin blossomed heathens to keep it going. Pics are mandatory and it goes without saying that rule number one is...YOU MUST BE DRUNK WHEN COOKING!!

So get the divorce papers ready, get your favorite bottle of liquid stupid and get cookin' ya'll!

Cheers, TB.
 
well dude one day we have to meet up for a barbie and post our triumphs (or fk ups ha ha). Would be cool If Gasi joined us too.
 
So Easter came and went but the ham stayed. With only two in the house, a whole ham takes a bit to work through, so you gotta get creative. Like tropical devilled ham salad!

First you devil the ham with some mayo, pineapple, roasted red bell pepper, ginger and a bit of my manzano pepper mango salsa at the end of the pulsing so there's a little bit of chunky fruit dispersed throughout and you get this

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Then chop up a little lettuce and another manzano and you get this

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Ham salad that'd make a Hawaiian homesick. :woohoo: Also the unpictured inspirational alcohol is Newcastle's Summer Ale. Damn tasty and a bit lighter than their nut-brown.
 
EOFresno-
nice job on the deviled ham salad! I'll be looking for the NCB summer ale. don't like the heavy beers so much~

That dinner looks light and refreshingly HOT! Good Job!
 
Leftover night here in the Blues Kitchen. Leftover refried beans, corn, black olives and onions, pickled 'peno's and cheese. Slap it all together, whir and stir and pack it into fresh 'peno's I picked up today for .68 cents a pound. That's right..sixty eight cents a pound!!

Here's the torpedo red..

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Nuthin' but cast iron will do...

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Might as well floatem' in a boat of enchy sauce too!

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Tasty mojofication!
 
Leftover night here in the Blues Kitchen. Leftover refried beans, corn, black olives and onions, pickled 'peno's and cheese. Slap it all together, whir and stir and pack it into fresh 'peno's I picked up today for .68 cents a pound. That's right..sixty eight cents a pound!!


Might as well floatem' in a boat of enchy sauce too!

IMG_3031.jpg


Tasty mojofication!

TB, those would be worth the rath of a double post in the popper thread. Great idea with the enchilada sauce, very inspiring for the weekend.
 
So Easter came and went but the ham stayed. With only two in the house, a whole ham takes a bit to work through, so you gotta get creative. Like tropical devilled ham salad!

First you devil the ham with some mayo, pineapple, roasted red bell pepper, ginger and a bit of my manzano pepper mango salsa at the end of the pulsing so there's a little bit of chunky fruit dispersed throughout and you get this


005-3.jpg


Ham salad that'd make a Hawaiian homesick. :woohoo: Also the unpictured inspirational alcohol is Newcastle's Summer Ale. Damn tasty and a bit lighter than their nut-brown.


Way to go using up the big pile of pork, gives me some ideas for some of ours that's in the freezes. Except the bones goin in the beans. See you at the chile festival in June.
 
EOF with the Hamtastic!!! All you need are some hot, buttery croissants!

TB....ya had me till you drown'em in the red stuff. Not a fan of enchiladas or the sauce. Otherwise....they look awesome!
 
PK2 - there's "enchilada sauce" like you find up Nawth. Then there's ENCHILADA SAUCE like you find in Mejico, Tejas.... ain't nuthin' up this way like it.

TB, I'm sure you enjoyed them at least to the same level of my jealousy - YUM!
 
Right you are Geeme on the enchy sauce. Marfa, TX style is the only way to go, the original.

Paul, if'n we ever get to par-tay...we will teach each other a few 'thangs about greasin' and cookin' amigo. I will steal every secret you have!
 
TB I loooooovvvveee you. Please send me some of that. But, please at least start drinking some tequila again will ya? YOu're starting to scare me.
 
TB I loooooovvvveee you. Please send me some of that. But, please at least start drinking some tequila again will ya? YOu're starting to scare me.

My blood pressure has been good at 120/80 for a good while. Tequila doesn't help it but then...all 'thangs in moderation and I am overdue for some Sauza Hornito's. 'Sides..I have to hook up with AJ soon and it wouldn't be Texican without doing a shot with THE MAN!
 
My blood pressure has been good at 120/80 for a good while. Tequila doesn't help it but then...all 'thangs in moderation and I am overdue for some Sauza Hornito's. 'Sides..I have to hook up with AJ soon and it wouldn't be Texican without doing a shot with THE MAN!

Mine is 180/92.....


I win.
 
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