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Burgers? Hell Yeah!!

Hey y'all looking through the sacred THP scrolls it is apparent that most awesome of foods is sorely neglected. That's right chidren's, I'm talkin' about BURGERS!! Sliders. Pub burgers. Fast food style burgers. Gastro burgers. Cheffy burgers. CHEESEBURGERS!!! Single and double meat. Triple meat. Extreme burgers. Man vs. Food burgers....the list is endless but y'all get the idea.

We won't go into the endless arguments of who created the first hamburger (Fletcher Davis) or what meat qualifies as a burger. Nonetheless....here are the rules for posting in this soon to be awesome thread:

1. Any meat goes. Beef, chicken, pork, lamb, rat, fish. Whatever, hunt it down and kill it with a knife. Its all good and I've included the options other than the traditional beef so all the kids can play in the pool. If its ground and round, its all good.

2. The damn 'thang has to be between 2 slices of bread or bun. White bread. Brioche. Sourdough. English muffin. Whole wheat. Its got to be bready. No wrap crap or wild pizza dough like chingaderra's.

3. Any cooking method goes. Grilled. Broiled. Griddled. Steamed. Deep fried. Zippo lighter.

4. Because I love to ridicule to no end tree hugging granola wimps and hippy's.....
Veggie burgers are all good. Just be prepared for the woe and gnashing of teeth and smack talk that will soon come if you post it. It will be all in fun and all good.

5. You suck at cooking? The only thing that would suck more is if you posted pics of your restaurant burger. For the sake of keeping the comedy rolling...
Any burger you didn't cook or you bought is allowed and is all good. Warning: while allowed, posting pics of BK burgers or their ilk with a splash of tabasco will bring upon you the most ridicule and insults. Even more than a veggie burger!

6. Chile's and/or hotsauce is mandatory on the burger. ON the burger, no crap on the side.

7. Pics are mandatory. No posting about a burger you made or ate without pics. You will suffer extreme ridicule and experience much loathing. Just don't do it.

8. Include a list of condiments and toppings. Mayo. Mustard. Onions. Cheese. Extract of male baboon spermatazoa. Whatever. Post it.

There it is y'all. Can you get down brown with it? Allrighty then...

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Here's mine. Sliders. 80/20 ground chuck from Matador Meat Market, Frisco, Tx. Cooked over fine diced yellow onions in cast iron using the smash technique. Toasted Pepperidge Farm slider buns with mustard, the onions, dill pickle and jalapeno pickle slices. Kraft brand American Plastic Cheese.

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Adult beverages are encouraged in the pics but not mandatory. Dig that awesome cast iron crust sear!

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So bring on your burgers. And that means those damn Aussie's and their stinkin' beet root too!!
 
grantmichaels said:
is "done" Aussie for "ruined" or such?
 
"Done" as in "charged through the roof" but it has a broader usage than that. Mostly it means "caught for" GM.
 
texas blues said:
 
I remember somebody posting a half and half grill/ griddle top a while back that looked like an orgasmatron.
 
I coulda' swore it was an Aussie that posted it.
 
Don't remember if it was gas fired or charcoal.
 
Damn 'thang got me all sexed up when I saw the pic.
 
Now that I'm thinkin' 'bout it I'm all kine'o excited.
 
Gas actually, but does a good smoke with a smoker box over one of the burners.......
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For old times sake.
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Here's some more sex'in up.
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Ok, I'm done.
 
 
SR.
 
texas blues said:
Smashed sliders.
 
80/20 chuck, mandoline'd onion. mustard splooge.
 
Flat topped.
 

 
Flipped after less than 1 minute and topped with Tillamook cheddar.
 

 
Onto grilled Pepperidge Farm Whole Wheat Buns.
 
Messy.
 

 
Take a bite of slider and then chase it with a bite of pickled 'peno.
 

 
Normally my limit is 2.
 
These were so damn guud! that I ate all four.
 

 
There is the whole flame grilled vs. cast iron/flat top grill and I certainly appreciate those, especially Booma, that love their 
 
flame grilled burgers.
 
For me its cast iron or flat top, and preferably a flat top.
 
I reckon each individual's preference is triggered from childhood experience.
 
My fondest memories are of grandpa's flat topped cheeseburgers at the tavern he owned and operated.
 
Dundee, MI 1969.
 
Kinney's Town Tavern.
That is a big ass thumb or a skinny ring....oh wait we are in the burger thread!
 
TB, when you gonna have my red meat love child? 
 
 
ps. I need one of those burgers stat! 
 
Chris that is a true compliment coming from the likes of you.
 
Much obliged senor.
 
And I know you are a connoisseur of burgers as well.
 
Tell me though, have you tried the smash technique like I do?
 
I know you like grilled too.
 
The Hot Pepper said:
 
Me? ... La Frieda beef comes tomorrow ... I'll be brewing beer tomorrow evening, and planning to make some burger buns w/ amylase on Saturday, hopefully, for burger's gone wild ...
 
I might take a swipe at the jerk wings, too, we'll see ...
 
grantmichaels said:
 
Me? ... La Frieda beef comes tomorrow ... I'll be brewing beer tomorrow evening, and planning to make some burger buns w/ amylase on Saturday, hopefully, for burger's gone wild ...
 
I might take a swipe at the jerk wings, too, we'll see ...
 
Pat La Frieda is the meat vendor for Shake Shack.
 
When mrs. blues went there finally after my urgings she said it was lame.
 
She said it was poor copy of INO.
 
And that was the SS by the park in NYC.
 
Too bad really as I was looking forward to trying not only the new INO in Austin but
 
also the new SS opening there.
 
You get PLF meat sent to you?
 
Ground chuck?
 
Or a chuck/brisket blend?
 
Spill.
 
On another note, I've been trying forever to get THP to go and try Shake Shack and get the lowdown.
 
Bastige he is.
 
Yeah, I cooked those sliders on the SS on the Weber that just missed the TD a couple back ...

This time I tried the beef made from short ribs, in 1/2 lb patties ...

We'll see if it's awesome or not - been looking forward to doing some grilling on the Akorn ...

I'm hoping to bake some spiffy buns in the Akorn for them ...
 
Have mercy!
 
Knuck's know some real deal sheeit.
 
Ash, that looks as hot blue and righteous as any 'thang posted in this thread.
 
And I could dig on some ground lamb.
 
The feta splooge is rockin' hard.
 
Do tell us what's all up in that 'thang.
 
I am loving that loooong time.
 
texas blues said:
Do tell us what's all up in that 'thang.
 
Ashen said:
lamb burger again..   This time with a  feta cream sauce and some homemade 4 pepper jelly. ( mostly jalepeno, cayenne pods with a few white ghost and trin. scorps)   There was some hot berbere , cinnamon, cumin , dried orengano&thyme in the burger mix. 
 
grantmichaels said:
Still don't know what to say about lamb, but looks tasty and assuming I'd like lamb, looks good ;)
You would, and it is.  Lamb burgers are a cut above beef burgers IMHO, just a slightly richer flavour from lamb than you get from beef.  My favourite is lamb burgers with harissa paste.  
 
I must make a batch of harissa now that the chillies are starting to ripen and my dried bhut pods have arrived
 
BOOM!

Incoming!

Pat La Frieda Beer-Cheese Short-Rib Burger

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for tb ...

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#Searzall'd that Duke's ...

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Spiked a mix of Benton's smoked bacon fat w/ a few slices of chili ...

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And then added a couple of fresh curry leaves ...

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Tellicherry, kosher salt, and freeze dried red onion crispies ...

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Work that brown fat Maillard magic drizzle ...

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Don't *really* drain, 131F ...

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#Searzall beer cheese ...

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Plated after a bump (please) ...

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This kicked-up Texas Mustard Hot Sauce is perfect for this ...

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Splooge rally ...

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Get. In. There.

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Fucking, whatever ...

I take no credit ...

I couldn't rec the La Frieda slider meat, made w/ the regular beef mix ...

This, this ... this Short Rib ground is $$$ ...

Wonder how the brisket ground is? =)
 
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