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Burgers? Hell Yeah!!

Hey y'all looking through the sacred THP scrolls it is apparent that most awesome of foods is sorely neglected. That's right chidren's, I'm talkin' about BURGERS!! Sliders. Pub burgers. Fast food style burgers. Gastro burgers. Cheffy burgers. CHEESEBURGERS!!! Single and double meat. Triple meat. Extreme burgers. Man vs. Food burgers....the list is endless but y'all get the idea.

We won't go into the endless arguments of who created the first hamburger (Fletcher Davis) or what meat qualifies as a burger. Nonetheless....here are the rules for posting in this soon to be awesome thread:

1. Any meat goes. Beef, chicken, pork, lamb, rat, fish. Whatever, hunt it down and kill it with a knife. Its all good and I've included the options other than the traditional beef so all the kids can play in the pool. If its ground and round, its all good.

2. The damn 'thang has to be between 2 slices of bread or bun. White bread. Brioche. Sourdough. English muffin. Whole wheat. Its got to be bready. No wrap crap or wild pizza dough like chingaderra's.

3. Any cooking method goes. Grilled. Broiled. Griddled. Steamed. Deep fried. Zippo lighter.

4. Because I love to ridicule to no end tree hugging granola wimps and hippy's.....
Veggie burgers are all good. Just be prepared for the woe and gnashing of teeth and smack talk that will soon come if you post it. It will be all in fun and all good.

5. You suck at cooking? The only thing that would suck more is if you posted pics of your restaurant burger. For the sake of keeping the comedy rolling...
Any burger you didn't cook or you bought is allowed and is all good. Warning: while allowed, posting pics of BK burgers or their ilk with a splash of tabasco will bring upon you the most ridicule and insults. Even more than a veggie burger!

6. Chile's and/or hotsauce is mandatory on the burger. ON the burger, no crap on the side.

7. Pics are mandatory. No posting about a burger you made or ate without pics. You will suffer extreme ridicule and experience much loathing. Just don't do it.

8. Include a list of condiments and toppings. Mayo. Mustard. Onions. Cheese. Extract of male baboon spermatazoa. Whatever. Post it.

There it is y'all. Can you get down brown with it? Allrighty then...

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

Here's mine. Sliders. 80/20 ground chuck from Matador Meat Market, Frisco, Tx. Cooked over fine diced yellow onions in cast iron using the smash technique. Toasted Pepperidge Farm slider buns with mustard, the onions, dill pickle and jalapeno pickle slices. Kraft brand American Plastic Cheese.

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Adult beverages are encouraged in the pics but not mandatory. Dig that awesome cast iron crust sear!

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So bring on your burgers. And that means those damn Aussie's and their stinkin' beet root too!!
 
all this prepper talk makes me think, it's been a while since i've checked the dates on some of the less used items in the pantry  :think:
I might be makin some canned albacore tuna melts in the next coupla days here  :drooling:
 
on another note 'tropical-cowboy-serranos' are amazeballs and i only expect them to get better aging in the fridge  :woohoo:
 
@ TB if you aren't putting fresh pineapple rings or chunks then red onions at the bottom of your pickled B&B penos... your missing out yo !
 
 
:cheers:
 
 
 
Talk about Da-Railed!!!
 
Kinda like this CAsian Po-Boy meets Bahn Mi fish sandwich. Started with real fish.
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I made a remoulade with Mayo, dill pickles, horse radish and some of GIP's POW, it came out good enough to lick off of flip flops, 4Reelz. Added some thin sliced cukes too.
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Topped that with tomato, fresh made Korean pickled carrots and daikon radish, more remoulade then a fish plank.
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Lettuce and cilantro
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This was a flavor bomb!!!
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Didn't last long either.
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Here's some real burgers.
 
Cast iron.
 
HEB Thick Jalapeno Bacon.
 
THIIIIICK!!!!
 
Like hot 5'2" blue eyed 140 pound red head thick.
 
That shows up with a bottle of tequila in her right hand.
 
And a bottle of Viagra in her left.
 
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Now dip some slider buns in the grease.
 
And toast 'em on the comal.
 
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Throw down some onion slices in the bacon grease.
 
And drop deuces of 80/20 ground beef on 'em.
 
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Smash 'em and abuse 'em.
 
Slap some colby scheese on 'em.
 
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Mayo and roma tomatoficate 'em.
 
Pimp 'em with home made.
 
Bread and butter jalapenos.
 
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Now chairman mao.
 
With extreme prejudice.
 
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Juicy.
 
Didja' see?
 
All the burger sex splooge on the plate?
 
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Now y'all.
 
Know what to do.
 
Posty up.
 
Share that burger.
 
And love the one you're with.
 
Cheeseburgers.
 
Again.
 
 
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I like to be liking green olives.
 
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This is the hot long haired thick red head.
 
I was telling you about.
 
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Lord have mercy!
 
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I love cheeseburgers.
 
And hot red heads.
 
Don't even get me started.
 
On hot blonde womernz.
 
 
 
 
Love the one you're with.
 
Guatemalan Insanity Pepper said:
 
:eek:
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:crazy:
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
:cheers:
 
 
GIP.
 
You don't like cheeseburgers?
 
And green olives?
 
Thats cool and the gang.
 
I have some gay friends.
 
That don't agree with me on some things.
 
Normally about apparel and accessories.
 
But they like blondes and red heads too.
 
Cheeseburgers.
 
And green olives.
 
Even my gay friends.
 
Would say.
 
Your post.
 
Is GAF!
 
texas blues said:
 
 
GIP.
 
You don't like cheeseburgers?
 
And green olives?
 
Thats cool and the gang.
 
I have some gay friends.
 
That don't agree with me on some things.
 
Normally about apparel and accessories.
 
But they like blondes and red heads too.
 
Cheeseburgers.
 
And green olives.
 
Even my gay friends.
 
Would say.
 
Your post.
 
Is GAF!
i think you misunderstand.
 
 
 I like cheeseburgers, I even like green olives...
But together...
  :eek:  that's way up there on the weird shit o-meter for me man
 
 I dig the redheads and the blonde womenz too  :party:
 
Never met one that didnt like my burgers either  ;)  with NO olives green or otherwise.
 
and who doesn't like Steven Stills or CSNY ?
 
 
 
 
 
 What does any of this burger talk have to do with you and your gay friends ?
I'm confused  :confused:
 
Guatemalan Insanity Pepper said:
i think you misunderstand.
 
 
 I like cheeseburgers, I even like green olives...
But together...
  :eek:  that's way up there on the weird shit o-meter for me man
 
 I dig the redheads and the blonde womenz too  :party:
 
Never met one that didnt like my burgers either  ;)  with NO olives green or otherwise.
 
and who doesn't like Steven Stills or CSNY ?
 
 
 
 
 
 What does any of this burger talk have to do with you and your gay friends ?
I'm confused  :confused:
 
I lied.
 
I don't have any gay friends.
 
But I do love green olives.
 
On cheeseburgers.
 
And have mercy!
 
Blondes and redheads.
 
That is the truth!
 
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