• We welcome content that is not political, divisive, or offensive. If we feel your content leans this way or has the potential to, it may be removed at any time. A hot pepper forum is not the place for such content. Thank you for respecting the community!

The Chronicles of JayT

The humidity hung like a curtain in the air. Whoever said chicks don't sweat hadn't ever been here - the deepest jungle on the equator in the hottest part of the year. The mosquitos were relentless as we slowly made our way through the undergrowth. Our faces were streaked with blood from thorny branches slapping at us as we went by. Pi had it hardest of all, as her wheelchair kept getting stuck in the mire - we had to stop to dig her out about every 10 minutes. Marcie was miserable, as the collection of silly bands up and down her arms kept snagging tree limbs and holding her fast. The CI DO was weighing heavy in SL's arms - it would be a good thing to have if we ever found dry wood and something to cook in it, not to mention a way to start a fire. But for now it was just a heavy child to shift from hip to hip, with no relief to be had. I was using my Kitchenaid Santuko knife to hack through the flora and fauna, with some aid from haiku, who had found a way to user her chopsticks to part the branches. The strange thing was, none of us could remember how we even got here. We were hot and sweaty, caked with mud and blood, and breathing heavily when we came across a small clearing. Exhausted, we threw ourselves down on the ground for a rest, throwing our arms over our eyes to shield them from the sun.

I thought surely I had passed out and was hallucinating, because I suddenly thought I heard the sound of water lapping on a beach. Pi said "what the.....?" as the smell of a smokey fire wafted our way. We all sat up at once, though, at hearing JayT say "soup's on", just as a microwave chimed. We found we were on a sunny beach, clean and bikini-clad, with sangrias propped in the sand next to each of us. SL's CI DO was on the fire, simmering with chili to accompany the hotdogs JayT was pulling out of the microwave for us. We eagerly dug in, not even noticing there was nowhere to plug in the microwave. Finally, we remembered our manners, and turned to thank JT. Before we could say anything, he glinted his baby blues at us, said "nice bikinis, ladies", and smiled like a grinning Cheshire cat until even his pearly whites disappeared. Just then we noticed the Jeep with the engine running. Clambering on board, we found a map with a large X, and the expected "You Are Here" emblazoned on it. As we drove off, we threw kisses in the air, and shouted "thank you JayT!"

True Story
 
Damnit i haven't got the time to read all this awesomeness at the moment, it'll keep.

I will say one thing though, im bloody proud to have named my dog after the great man himself. Whodathunkit :lol:
 
Nova, give yourself a cheer-up and read from the beginning! It's worth it!

geeme~~~~that last one was GREAT! jmho~~~~ :rofl:
 
@ Geeme - masterful!

"...he glinted his baby blues at us, said "nice bikinis, ladies"..." <-- truly epic!

I'ma go microwave a hot-dog Silly Band clad to the nines.
 
some say.......he can make a hot dog out of a rattlesnake shot in a dry ditch gulch

some say........he can smoke a capybara and a squid in an imu in Vanuatu while eating a microwaved hot dog in Tesax.

some say...........Disney has a patented contraption in his bathroom for capture of faery dust....



all I know is.......they call him....Jay...T....





true story~
 
geeme - Wow what an exciting expierence, and only The Man, The Mystery, The Awsome One known to us mere mortals as JayT could have done it. Thanks for sharing that with us. Reading of everything that JayT has done, aside from my own expierence, truly gives me hope for the future and a reason to get up and go on each day.


"We eagerly dug in, not even noticing there was nowhere to plug in the microwave." WOW! He has a microwave powered by nothing more than his own Awsomness! Only JayT.

Humbly Submitted,
 
Nah - in this thread, if JayT can look like JayB, we can look like Demi Moore or [insert name of famous hot chick here.] Proper response is "damn, I look so hot!"
 
Nah - in this thread, if JayT can look like JayB, we can look like Demi Moore or Jamie Lee Curtis. Proper response is "damn, I look so hot!"


fify ;) :lol
 
JayT asked my dog JayT to fetch him a knife so he could carve a turkey, it only took him but a few seconds to return with the implement but in that time Jay got a little impatient and carved it with his mind powers. He then willed it overseas to feed millions of starving children. That was about a year ago now.

The problem is though my pooch won't let go of the damn knife, wont eat, sleep, just doesn't want to do anything but hold that damn knife because he thinks he offended his god. Please Jay let him know though those awesome mind powers of yours that he didn't really dissapoint you.

This was taken just now as undeniable proof.

Photo512.jpg
 
Nah - can't say I agree with your assessment, TB.... the little guy looks absolutely adorable!

Now I just need to l'arn him how to weld, and he'll be a right handy little fella. Aw come on Nova, you can send him over here for a while, can't ya?
 
He only turned liked that after Jay had his way with his little doggy brain, here i will show you a before pic....


Photo035-1-1.jpg


Admittedly he was in a rather happy mood after returning from Sheens house....
 
Back
Top