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The Drunken Chef

Hey ya'll once again from the big dry ditch of Las Vegas. I had picked up some beautiful chix I wanted to deep fry but soon discovered I didn't have enough oil. Why not just drive down to the local grub store and buy it you ask? BECAUSE I WAS PISS DRUNK!! Alrighty then. I grab the bottle of Hornitos tequila and ready myself to begin the destruction. I fire up the cast iron dutch oven and just start throwing stuff in. Olive oil. Garilc. Julieanned shallot. Chix thighs. Gets a little blurry here but I somehow managed to debone the thighs without chopping off my leg but then all good cooks should be able to pull that off. The vast majority of experienced kitchen rats and riffraff cook much better after a bottle of wine or three. Those of you reading this keep that little kitchen tip in mind, especially when family from out of town is around. If the wife is chewing your ass the next day for your drunken lewd and lascivious behavior in the kitchen the previous night, then you know you must have made a helluva meal and did it right.

Continuing on, I soon missplaced my shot glass and decided to dispensed with it all together. Why should tequila have to go through a middleman anyway. Liquors quicker straight from the bottle. I discovered I had a stash of dried pequins from last season and bada bing bada boom in they went. Same with some forlorn looking button mushrooms. Whirring and stirring with a spoon in one hand and the bottle of firewater in the other, why not deglaze the pan with tequila? Excellent idea! Might as well get rid of the rest of the hab salsa I made the other day. In that goes, adios baby! Add some seasalt and cracked black pepper. Whir and stir. Taste. It tastes like burning. Nice.

Somehow during this culinary rampage I managed to take a few pics.

The beginning of the end...

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I think this was chicken..


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Stewing in its own juices, just like me..

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I can't be sure but I think I ate it with tortilla's but who can say. This morning as I looked at the devastation in the Blues Kitchen I reckoned that were I to detonate a hundred pounds of C4
in the middle of it I would only cause about $21.47 worth of damage. Mrs. Blues was not amused but and well acquainted with my late night shenanigans. Ahhh marital bliss.

Now that I have started this thread, I call on all you THP drunks, sots, and gin blossomed heathens to keep it going. Pics are mandatory and it goes without saying that rule number one is...YOU MUST BE DRUNK WHEN COOKING!!

So get the divorce papers ready, get your favorite bottle of liquid stupid and get cookin' ya'll!

Cheers, TB.
 
aaaawwee I got myself drunk as a skunk by mixin tequila and some shite cherry brandy I bought for the Hols (that cheap crap they give you for shots in the bars up here in Wisc in the winter when people would drink ANYTHING just to stay alive.....}

knocked out this dish for supper and it was deeelish. Inspired by Paulky with his mac 'n cheese, but I needed a lot of heat, I needed it bad...

Combined a hot sauce I made on the weekend with some Louisiana wing sauce, aboot 50:50

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coated some wings and bacon in the hot mix, added a bit more of the HOT sauce and drank an IPA on the side...

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Grilled up them little wings and da bacon...

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Made a kinda mac'n cheese....not very authentic but nice and hot....made a bechamel with hot paprika and habanero powder in the flour/butter base....added some 5 yr old cheddar, garlic, mozza......cooked some andouille, mushrooms, green onion, garlic and a habanero in the skillet.....boiling pasta on the side....

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Combined the pasta, cheese and other stuff then baked it on high for 20 mins in the CI skillet.....

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Plated the mac 'n cheese, wings, diced up the bacon off the grill and sprinkled over the mac 'n cheese, added a diced habanero and sloshed on some of the hot sauce....sprinkle of tarragon and cilantro.


Damn this tasted really good and was hot, hot...

consumed with an IPA, bottle of sauvignon blanc, and now on to the hard stuff and feelin it..

Yee Ha..:beer:
 
Look at Rooze showing off his new shiny crown. Welcome to the fold, Brother. I wanna see more cheap alcohol pics!

(Awesome Hot mac'n'cheese wings) - (pics of LOTS of alcohol) = almost awesome
 
Look at Rooze showing off his new shiny crown. Welcome to the fold, Brother. I wanna see more cheap alcohol pics!

(Awesome Hot mac'n'cheese wings) - (pics of LOTS of alcohol) = almost awesome

Damn, you're right. I got the worst hang over I've had in weeks yet there's only one bottle of beer shown in my pics. I'm a disgrace to drunken cheffery and will have to get my finger out, wash it, then try harder :beer:
 
so I made what I assumed was going to be some of the most mild wings I have ever made for myself, as I used no other sauces other than franks as a base

added of course garlic which like we all know I add to absolutely everything, blackened seasoning, old bay, and what I assumed was a small amount of red savina powder, which usually I add in small pinches to full on dishes, but have never actually added to wings

well apparently right around a heaping tablespoon is too freakin much, because I ate 7 of the 9 I made, and I could hardly breathe

just finished off the last 2 wings, and holy shit my stomach is a disaster right now

work tomorrow is going to suck, 14 hour shift and I am going to be in the bathroom for half of it, I can just predict it now
 
naw it wouldnt be yeast, it would be a combination of lactobacillus, pediococcus, megaspheara, delbrucki, and things that will not be named
 
Don't worry. I'm sure Bear will show up sometime soon!!
He got into a little brush with the law, but he'll be back before you can say "Public Intoxication".
 
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