And I don't want any of that chewy crap in my beer. Does that mean I have to put it all in teh secondary glass bottle or can I achieve that clarity with the plastic bucket?
there are a couple of options you have
You can make whats called a steam beer
Basically use lager yeast yet ferment at room temps
Anchor Steam is a good example of this style
So you are going to put together an american lager recipe, which I can do for you if you want, and ferment it around 65-68 degrees using this hybrid lager/ale yeast, that way you dont have to use a chest freezer or any sort of cooling
as far as the clarity issue, its going to be difficult to clear your beer without some sort of secondary cooling
best way I have found from homebrewing, is primary in a bucket, secondary in a 5 gallon class carboy (reduce as much headspace as possible), and then keep that second one in a fridge for 2 weeks to help the yeast settle out
you wont get it CLEAR CLEAR, but it will be pretty good
if you want to get it crystal clear, the best way to do it is the above mentioned activities, only use a product called Biofine. I dont know if you can get it in homebrew stores or not, but its a silicon dioxide product that binds to your haze forming particles, and forces them to settle out of the beer
easiest way to do this is add it to a secondary fermenter right as you are transferring from your primary, and let it sit for 7 days or so, and your beer will look like a miller lite if thats what you want
but to answer your question, no, you will not be able to have a crystal clear beer from just a single primary fermentation, unless you have the ability to dump yeast via a conical fermenter, and reduce the temperature