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Tell a dumb joke...

:lol: Nice one Dave!
What's the difference between Glasgow Rangers and Walt Disney?

Rangers play football but Walt Disney.
 
Yes, I suppose you're right about the jokes, LordViykor, and I apologize if I hurt anyone's feelings - would never mean to.

I really did hear the jokes from Polish and black people though, who think they're kinda funny - but I also understand how some people could take offence, so I won't post those types of jokes again.


: )
 
two blind def mutes get married they are on theyre honey moon,
the wife suggest maybe we try it with the lights off, husband replies how will we know what each other wants?
wife replies, well if your in the mood shake my left breast once and if your not in the mood shake my right breast once.
Husband replies o.k then if your in the mood shake my penis once and if your not in the mood shake my penis like 80 times.
 
A Spanish woman visits England and meets a guy in a bar. They go back to his place and jump into bed. He's just about to hide the sausage when she says "drum your fingers on the headboard to remind me of the rain back home in Spain." He agrees with this strange request and is attempting re-entry when she says " flick the light switch on and off to remind me of the lightning back home in Spain." Getting impatient he does as she asks. With both his hands busy he has to switch the missile to heat-seeker mode and has almost found his target when she says "open and shut the wardrobe door with your foot to remind me of the thunder back home in Spain." By now the guy is resigned to doing anything to shut her up so he starts opening and closing the door with his foot. So now she's got her weather show, rain, lightning and thunder. Then she shouts "make love to me now, quickly!" The guy says "what, in this weather?"
 
Two blondes standing on opposite banks of a wide river...

Blonde #1 shouts across: HOW DO I GET TO THE OTHER SIDE?

Blonde #2 looks a bit puzzled...pauses....and then shouts:

You ARE on the other side!!!
 
Well, I guess it's ok to offend blondes - just not Polish or black people!!!


I actually don't mind the blonde jokes, but isn't it sending a double message, Lord Viykor?


: )
 
A friend just sent this to me in email...


BAM - YOU JUST GOT HIT BY THE PUMPKIN MASTER!!!


MammothPumpkin.jpg




OMG!!!!!


: O
 
The Hollyberry Lady said:
Yes, I suppose you're right about the jokes, LordViykor, and I apologize if I hurt anyone's feelings - would never mean to.

I really did hear the jokes from Polish and black people though, who think they're kinda funny - but I also understand how some people could take offence, so I won't post those types of jokes again.


: )
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No worries, this is a diverse community from all over the world jokes based on race or culture in my view are not good for the site.
 
The Hollyberry Lady said:
Well, I guess it's ok to offend blondes - just not Polish or black people!!!


I actually don't mind the blonde jokes, but isn't it sending a double message, Lord Viykor?


: )
Click to expand...

Last time I checked blondes weren't a ethnic or cultural group ;) but if it offends anyone I'll gladly remove it.

As a white male of the species I found the polish and black jokes offensive. Then again I generally find jokes knocking ethnic groups or any type of religous beliefs offensive. But hey that's just me.
 
As a white male of the species I found the polish and black jokes offensive. Then again I generally find jokes knocking ethnic groups or any type of religous beliefs offensive. But hey that's just me.
Click to expand...

I do see your point, of course.


Even though I am a blonde though, I still find blonde jokes funny. I am not offended at all. Please, do not delete them on my account.


: )


There mother must be so proud
Click to expand...


No kidding!!!!!


: O
 
Why is it when your wife gets pregnant

all her friends rub her belly and say "congratulations"

but nobody rubs your old fella and say's "Good Job"?
 
A crusty old Army Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

'Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?'

'Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature.'

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, 'It looks like you have seen a lot of action.'

'Yes, ma'am, a lot of action.'

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, 'You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself.'

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, 'You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out! I mean, no sex since 1955!"

She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to 'relax' him several times. Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, 'Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955.'

The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his watch, 'I Hope Not; It's only 2130 now.'


(Gotta Love Military Time)
 
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