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The Drunken Chef

Hey ya'll once again from the big dry ditch of Las Vegas. I had picked up some beautiful chix I wanted to deep fry but soon discovered I didn't have enough oil. Why not just drive down to the local grub store and buy it you ask? BECAUSE I WAS PISS DRUNK!! Alrighty then. I grab the bottle of Hornitos tequila and ready myself to begin the destruction. I fire up the cast iron dutch oven and just start throwing stuff in. Olive oil. Garilc. Julieanned shallot. Chix thighs. Gets a little blurry here but I somehow managed to debone the thighs without chopping off my leg but then all good cooks should be able to pull that off. The vast majority of experienced kitchen rats and riffraff cook much better after a bottle of wine or three. Those of you reading this keep that little kitchen tip in mind, especially when family from out of town is around. If the wife is chewing your ass the next day for your drunken lewd and lascivious behavior in the kitchen the previous night, then you know you must have made a helluva meal and did it right.

Continuing on, I soon missplaced my shot glass and decided to dispensed with it all together. Why should tequila have to go through a middleman anyway. Liquors quicker straight from the bottle. I discovered I had a stash of dried pequins from last season and bada bing bada boom in they went. Same with some forlorn looking button mushrooms. Whirring and stirring with a spoon in one hand and the bottle of firewater in the other, why not deglaze the pan with tequila? Excellent idea! Might as well get rid of the rest of the hab salsa I made the other day. In that goes, adios baby! Add some seasalt and cracked black pepper. Whir and stir. Taste. It tastes like burning. Nice.

Somehow during this culinary rampage I managed to take a few pics.

The beginning of the end...

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I think this was chicken..


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Stewing in its own juices, just like me..

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I can't be sure but I think I ate it with tortilla's but who can say. This morning as I looked at the devastation in the Blues Kitchen I reckoned that were I to detonate a hundred pounds of C4
in the middle of it I would only cause about $21.47 worth of damage. Mrs. Blues was not amused but and well acquainted with my late night shenanigans. Ahhh marital bliss.

Now that I have started this thread, I call on all you THP drunks, sots, and gin blossomed heathens to keep it going. Pics are mandatory and it goes without saying that rule number one is...YOU MUST BE DRUNK WHEN COOKING!!

So get the divorce papers ready, get your favorite bottle of liquid stupid and get cookin' ya'll!

Cheers, TB.
 
Jay that venison looks fantastic! I can almost smell it! Can't wait to see the country style pork ribs. Those are one of mrs. blues and my favorites.
 
They sure smell good. I just reseasoned them. This time I added more of the same rub, but also some smoked sea salt, aji red powder, and naga powder. Should be good and hot. I'm about ready to start saucing them. Shouldn't be too long now.
 
Sitting at the bar with Tim drinking a black and tan....waiting for our first 50-wing platter.

Woop-Woop!!!!!

***This message brought to you by iPod Touch and the letter "B"***
 
OMG, Jay you do realize that you have out done yourself today....:lol:.....First and incredible looking soup and now ribs that look good enough to kill for. Two wins back to back. You are on fire today buddy.
 
Oh, I have to tell you I was right to be a little afraid of these. They are hot. Taste is awesome, kind of sweet and smoky to start. Then as you keep eating, the heat builds in your entire mouth. I think the combination of the marinade and the powders worked perfect together. You just find it getting hotter and building with each bite, but no direct hit. It's like you know it's hot, but you don't know where it is coming from. It's an overall warm glow, not a punch in the face. I have to remember this one, I nailed it. The only thing I would do different is maybe a bit more salt. I like the ying and yang of salty and sweet.
 
Jay. SHAZAAM on teh ribs. I can smell teh spiceenesxt!!

Paul...touch phoning from the bar? We need a pic of that 50 wing platter for the WIN!! Otherwise.....it never happened!
 
Heh heh :lol: You know you have it bad when you are posting on THP from the bar. And Paul if you are listening, we need a piccy of the half-dressed waitress too.:party:
 
texas blues said:
Jay. SHAZAAM on teh ribs. I can smell teh spiceenesxt!!

Paul...touch phoning from the bar? We need a pic of that 50 wing platter for the WIN!! Otherwise.....it never happened!

JayT said:
Heh heh You know you have it bad when you are posting on THP from the bar. And Paul if you are listening, we need a piccy of the half-dressed waitress too.:party:

AWWW MAN!!!!

Just got back....that game sucked out loud!!! The wings were great!! Got 50 wings plain and crispy...with "blazin" sauce...the hottest they offer....it wasn't!, Mango habanero.....a very nice sweet heat....NOT hot!, spicy garlic.....too vinegary/harsh, and Asian spice....kinda like the hab sauce in heat....nice!

Retta got there and we ordered a pound of spicy popcorn shrimp.....;)

Black and tans.....Black and red (w/ killians!).....Newcastle drafts.....:woohoo:

No photos.....My iPod touch has no camera! I just wanted to brag! :lol:
 
JayT said:
No pics. Never happened. I take it you were at Buffalo Wild Wings.

I was, indeed! Kinda nice to OUT every once in a while.....I hardly ever get to that.

If it never happened....may I please have my bar tab back? :rofl:
 
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