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The Drunken Chef

Hey ya'll once again from the big dry ditch of Las Vegas. I had picked up some beautiful chix I wanted to deep fry but soon discovered I didn't have enough oil. Why not just drive down to the local grub store and buy it you ask? BECAUSE I WAS PISS DRUNK!! Alrighty then. I grab the bottle of Hornitos tequila and ready myself to begin the destruction. I fire up the cast iron dutch oven and just start throwing stuff in. Olive oil. Garilc. Julieanned shallot. Chix thighs. Gets a little blurry here but I somehow managed to debone the thighs without chopping off my leg but then all good cooks should be able to pull that off. The vast majority of experienced kitchen rats and riffraff cook much better after a bottle of wine or three. Those of you reading this keep that little kitchen tip in mind, especially when family from out of town is around. If the wife is chewing your ass the next day for your drunken lewd and lascivious behavior in the kitchen the previous night, then you know you must have made a helluva meal and did it right.

Continuing on, I soon missplaced my shot glass and decided to dispensed with it all together. Why should tequila have to go through a middleman anyway. Liquors quicker straight from the bottle. I discovered I had a stash of dried pequins from last season and bada bing bada boom in they went. Same with some forlorn looking button mushrooms. Whirring and stirring with a spoon in one hand and the bottle of firewater in the other, why not deglaze the pan with tequila? Excellent idea! Might as well get rid of the rest of the hab salsa I made the other day. In that goes, adios baby! Add some seasalt and cracked black pepper. Whir and stir. Taste. It tastes like burning. Nice.

Somehow during this culinary rampage I managed to take a few pics.

The beginning of the end...

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I think this was chicken..


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Stewing in its own juices, just like me..

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I can't be sure but I think I ate it with tortilla's but who can say. This morning as I looked at the devastation in the Blues Kitchen I reckoned that were I to detonate a hundred pounds of C4
in the middle of it I would only cause about $21.47 worth of damage. Mrs. Blues was not amused but and well acquainted with my late night shenanigans. Ahhh marital bliss.

Now that I have started this thread, I call on all you THP drunks, sots, and gin blossomed heathens to keep it going. Pics are mandatory and it goes without saying that rule number one is...YOU MUST BE DRUNK WHEN COOKING!!

So get the divorce papers ready, get your favorite bottle of liquid stupid and get cookin' ya'll!

Cheers, TB.
 
Here comes Taco Tuesday at the Circle-H.....

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Hola....Que Pasa???....

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Cheese, jalapenos, biohazard, and chips:

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Making of my famous refried bean dip:

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More to come, amigos....
 
80/20, ground pork, onion, garlic, Guinness, and taco seasoning......beat that.

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The Final plating...cause I know you all complain about my prep pics....

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Yep.....it rocks to live with me. :cool:
 
Damn, Paul...I sure hope that's the queso splatterd across the plate...cuz' I know looking at that meal made me feel kinda funny...you know...in my naughty bits.
 
I hope he's laughing!! That stuff looked awesome! No shame in that one.

Dude, you have every keystone accessory.
I gotta contact the fine people at Busch Light and find out why they are so lacking on beer can decor.
 
Beautiful PK, your presentations are so Keystoneish.

Yes......yes they are!


Guinness in taco meat...

Great cooking paul!

It works soooooo well in it!!!


Damn, Paul...I sure hope that's the queso splatterd across the plate...cuz' I know looking at that meal made me feel kinda funny...you know...in my naughty bits.

.....now that you mention it....it does look a bit......uh.....


Love how you roll Paul!


Thanks TB.....thanks to everyone!

....and yes, I AM laughing!! :clap:
 
Well crap...now I have to post after Tuesday Taco Night at the Circle H and Wheebz' goodness....

Went to the "hippy joint" as some may call it for bread and milk..got hungry while there and came home with some extra stuff...nice n simple tonight...meat, potaters, a veggie, and some seafood.

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The main ingredients..bottle of foo foo vodka is almost transparent for some reason

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Meat on a paper plate rubbed with ghost pepper salt and butchers rub..sprayed it down with olive oil from the Mr. Misto.

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Some decent size shrimp sprinkled with ghost pepper salt and pirates bite seasoning

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Tater and broccoli added to the mix with a cheap vodka and sprite drink in the background

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Mess of a picture but Yum!!

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Cheers!
 
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