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The Drunken Chef

Hey ya'll once again from the big dry ditch of Las Vegas. I had picked up some beautiful chix I wanted to deep fry but soon discovered I didn't have enough oil. Why not just drive down to the local grub store and buy it you ask? BECAUSE I WAS PISS DRUNK!! Alrighty then. I grab the bottle of Hornitos tequila and ready myself to begin the destruction. I fire up the cast iron dutch oven and just start throwing stuff in. Olive oil. Garilc. Julieanned shallot. Chix thighs. Gets a little blurry here but I somehow managed to debone the thighs without chopping off my leg but then all good cooks should be able to pull that off. The vast majority of experienced kitchen rats and riffraff cook much better after a bottle of wine or three. Those of you reading this keep that little kitchen tip in mind, especially when family from out of town is around. If the wife is chewing your ass the next day for your drunken lewd and lascivious behavior in the kitchen the previous night, then you know you must have made a helluva meal and did it right.

Continuing on, I soon missplaced my shot glass and decided to dispensed with it all together. Why should tequila have to go through a middleman anyway. Liquors quicker straight from the bottle. I discovered I had a stash of dried pequins from last season and bada bing bada boom in they went. Same with some forlorn looking button mushrooms. Whirring and stirring with a spoon in one hand and the bottle of firewater in the other, why not deglaze the pan with tequila? Excellent idea! Might as well get rid of the rest of the hab salsa I made the other day. In that goes, adios baby! Add some seasalt and cracked black pepper. Whir and stir. Taste. It tastes like burning. Nice.

Somehow during this culinary rampage I managed to take a few pics.

The beginning of the end...

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I think this was chicken..


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Stewing in its own juices, just like me..

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I can't be sure but I think I ate it with tortilla's but who can say. This morning as I looked at the devastation in the Blues Kitchen I reckoned that were I to detonate a hundred pounds of C4
in the middle of it I would only cause about $21.47 worth of damage. Mrs. Blues was not amused but and well acquainted with my late night shenanigans. Ahhh marital bliss.

Now that I have started this thread, I call on all you THP drunks, sots, and gin blossomed heathens to keep it going. Pics are mandatory and it goes without saying that rule number one is...YOU MUST BE DRUNK WHEN COOKING!!

So get the divorce papers ready, get your favorite bottle of liquid stupid and get cookin' ya'll!

Cheers, TB.
 
I was in the mood for some spicy hijinx tonight. Wings!

The ingredients:

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Mixed a lot of the habanero spice with the breading mix. Coated each wing.

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Baked for awhile then coated with Defcon 1.

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So good, and plenty of leftovers!
 
TB I stood in 5 minutes of shame for each can of beans I added but I don't think they could handle Real Texas chili. I've also made a sign up for the front that says Texas Chili Stew. Bet that will raise a few questions!
 
I was in the mood for some spicy hijinx tonight. Wings!

The ingredients:

20111102_200732.jpg


Mixed a lot of the habanero spice with the breading mix. Coated each wing.

20111102_202431.jpg


Baked for awhile then coated with Defcon 1.

20111102_212150.jpg


So good, and plenty of leftovers!

Impy, that is so funny. I made almost exactly the same wings last night. Defcon 1 with the Cajun Seasoning from Hell. I deep fried mine though. Great minds think alike.
 
by Resume do you mean profile? because someone is a closet beaner :fart:

:rofl: Nah, I was referring to the fact that serving that hot ass chile to your coworkers might leave the company restrooms a smoldering heap of rubble. Somebody's got to pay and we know it won't be the higher ups.
 
:rofl: Nah, I was referring to the fact that serving that hot ass chile to your coworkers might leave the company restrooms a smoldering heap of rubble. Somebody's got to pay and we know it won't be the higher ups.

Well, they loved it! Not a drop left over. So far as the bathrooms are concerned time will tell though I did notice that several people had their windows open and a fan on.
 
That reminded me of a few years ago my company had a party and my husband made five alarm sauce for chicken wings and lit everyone up pretty good. From that day on whenever I brought something in everyone was skeptical to try any. Sissy people :) It's fun to mess with people.
 
:rofl: Nah, I was referring to the fact that serving that hot ass chile to your coworkers might leave the company restrooms a smoldering heap of rubble. Somebody's got to pay and we know it won't be the higher ups.

:rofl: Oh the Carnage... and a handful of defriends on Facebook from all the wives **it really was the dog that time I swear!**
 
IMPY!!!! Where have you been? Glad you're back! There's a TD that starts tomorrow... you in? Hope everything's been going great for you.
AND you're wings look delicious. I ate wings all summer long, like every weekend, and I think now I'm really jonesn'...



Atta Boy Rocket man! "Texas Chili Stew" LOL!!!!! Looks good still, I'd eat it. (Especially cuz YOU made it.
 
IMPY!!!! Where have you been? Glad you're back! There's a TD that starts tomorrow... you in? Hope everything's been going great for you.
AND you're wings look delicious. I ate wings all summer long, like every weekend, and I think now I'm really jonesn'...



Atta Boy Rocket man! "Texas Chili Stew" LOL!!!!! Looks good still, I'd eat it. (Especially cuz YOU made it.

I need to catch up and see what the TD is for this month. I might have time to whip something up :). I accepted a new job and had TONS of vacation time at my old job to burn up before I lost it. So I'm taking most of next week off :). This weekend all I have on my plate (pun intended) is dinner with friends tomorrow night and then a birthday party after. If I do participate, remind me to CAREFULLY look at the rules this time!
 
I need to catch up and see what the TD is for this month. I might have time to whip something up :). I accepted a new job and had TONS of vacation time at my old job to burn up before I lost it. So I'm taking most of next week off :). This weekend all I have on my plate (pun intended) is dinner with friends tomorrow night and then a birthday party after. If I do participate, remind me to CAREFULLY look at the rules this time!

Impy, this t-down is " the best thing I ever ate", which means, there are no rules! You go girl!
 
Except the one she forgot last time, to add PoL! :lol:

Indeed. It had been a few months since I had participated in a TD, and I foolishly assumed that the rules were still the same - just post within the alloted timeframe. I didn't read the rules stated, booooo. Now HERE'S the kicker. I remembered to check back about the TD tonight. The best meal I've ever had happens to be WINGS, along with these suckers which I had a craving for tonight:

The suspects:

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Slices swimming in their bath:

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Batch #1:

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A mess of pickles, minus the ones I munched on:

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Yep, wings, fried pickles, and beer is my favorite meal lol. Can't participate this round, but this will be a VERY fun TD to watch. Cheers.
 
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